LIfe in ACJC

2008-11-26T20:08:00.000-08:00

we're done with 1/8 of our race in university
....tts scarily fast aint it ?
nevertheless im still thankful to be able to study
on home ground where my family is.

theres a list of things that im thankful for
-grandparents who love my bro and i dearly
-parents who are responsible and loving
-cell girls who are growing up well and inspirational,
cant ask for better.
-lovely hall mates
-nice sheltered walk below the canopy to and frm hall
-wonderful memories that lights up my fuzzy
heart when im bored.
-peace in s'pore
-hz as sch mate
-the holy sprit prompting within me to lead and guide me
when im being too domineering , or just being plain ugly
on the inside.

just wanna thk god for his provision.as a christian
there are many things that we cant do .
but i wont state them here
im struggling with one .
as i was reading thru the bk of daniel
i realised that althou i was thankful for his provision
i need to let go and place my trust in him
just like daniel when he refused food that that has
been presented before the gods of the king .
yet god made him strong and healthy
(for the complete and concise version, read the bible)
trusting

2008-09-22T04:49:00.000-07:00

ahhhh =) its recess !
finally , after 6 weeks of toilling and mugging and running abt hall
6 weeks of hall
its bz ,but i get to meet many amazing ppl
people who dont look like the kind of people
who do the things that they actually do.
in hall, we sing, dance, supper , try to study , do loads of saikang
sometimes in the midst of all theese i ask myself
after doing so much ...does it matter ???
so what if i can sing???
so what if i can dance??
or run???
why am i in hall?
its hard being in a non-christian environment after a while
suddenly all that i do is meaningless to myself
how do i please god in my activities ?
am i being a blessing=))).... i want to
i dun wanna live this yr in hall in vain
i wanna shine for his glory
i wanna be used by him
i wanna find the purpose that god has for me to fufil in hall
i wanna find the meaning of my life
anywaes i managed to find a cell grp in hall!
abt 6 of us =)))
it keeps me sane in a crazy world !
AHMEN

2008-09-07T09:57:00.000-07:00

i need to grow up the way god wants me to
i still feel like a child stuck in an ageing body
my mentality is sometimes quite bimbotic and haphazard
it is especially so when im tired and when my brain shuts down
common mings ur brains were made for a greater use =)
man im glad that i actually know what to work on now
just a few days ago i thought i was invinsible,
armed with gods grace
and nothing could fail
but heyys thru placing me in diff situation and
places ive never realli explored for a long time
ive found my weaknesses and im going to change
the strength does not come frm within me
but onli god can come and change the ugly-ness inside
i hope to become a better person with myself and the world
watch me grow =)
and help me grow

2008-08-21T11:39:00.000-07:00

hee i shall sneak in a post before i get back to civilisation(home)
away from the babaric studying here at ntu .
hee yes uni is siong , even more siong than in jc
right now i dun even have time for cca !
oh great , i hope i wont get kicked out of hall
thou
haha oh wells the opportunity cost for taking up engine
and being a learned citizen =)

how are u ?
i hope life has been good for u reader of thy blog =))

anywaes just to update u on my computing prof
heee i changed my class ! and am absolutely pleased with him
no more angst frm mings in the next few weeks

btw hall life has been great ! exept that boon lay
and jurong always has this
certain smell that lingers in the air .
also, because its a forested area
u'll see many red ants with blackbutts crawling all
over ur table even if there aint any sweet stuff arnd
heh thus many of our tables are graveyards for ants
and now i feel guilty for scolding cui in the past
for correction tapping the ants arnd her
cause im realli just as bad
i sqush them with my fingers *eeks * yeah when they attack me

aniwaes ive been feeling v.blessed admidst the things that surrounds me
=)))) peace that transends all understanding...heh i think i understand tt now =)

2008-08-15T09:18:00.000-07:00

its just week 2 of uni and im under tremendous stress
out of 25 students in my tut class
onli 2 of us are frm s'pore
thus making us the minority race in our own country
how queer
btw the foreigners are all on scholarship
and they call our maths "Zero level math"
when we think its realli quite difficult
they are so good to the point
that they come out with extended qns on their own and solve them
in other words they come out with a new formula and stuff
within SECONDS
even better than rjc students
sooooo stressed !
we also have to deal with lecturers speaking in heavily accented
ching-lish or hindi-glish
neither here nor there
oh btw the china and indian students feel comfy
with theese lecturers
because of the slang
sometimes its just fustrating
btw i freaking need to rant
some tutors take the joy out of learning esp prof song qing !
he doesnt teach
he freakin leaves u to die on ur own
hes the computing teacher
the first tutorial for computing in our life
and we are freaakin fustrated and irritated
at his foul attitude
we did our programming for the first time
and we had some errors
so we asked him for help
he freakin ignored us
time and again
without helping us point out the error
he just said "read the book"
2 hrs of no help with no idea what to do
i mean... cant he be more useful abit
so we were left stranded !
irritating PIG AHHHHH
we have a graded assignment in wk 5 its like week 2 alr !
i mean the heart is willing to learn but the stupid tut
teacher (shldnt even be a teacher )
just enjoy being a free loader sucking tax payers money
to hang arnd in the lab and laugh
at his silly own jokes
its again fustrating to see the foreign students
programming away like its so ez
(they learnt programming in their
countries for many yrs before comming over)
did i tell u,
we get kicked out of sch if we dun perform
and its bell-shaped !
so stressed, fustrated and helpless
we def didnt start at the same level as the foreign students
in a sense its not fair but the world has nv been fair
their jc life was prolly 5 times more hectic
to know so much i guess.
sighhhhhs ! i need more s'porean classmates !
at least the classrom will be condusive for asking qns
as the ppl genuinely dun know
because they dun have prior knowledge and the tut teacher
will be willing to teach seeing that a few ppl dun know.
i cant believe the foreign students laugh at others
just because they think its ez
get a life !
at least show some humanism

2008-07-13T00:22:00.000-07:00

mings shall be away for a week
says camp insinyur (engine camp for ntu)
i just hope its a proper camp
and that they dun make us do weird stuff
cui says"aiyah just go there to see how despo some ppl can get"
haha ! i love cui she always has a solution for any worries
btw im so happy
cause im lookin forward to night cycling !
something out of reach
for a sheltered kid like me
the only exciting thing ive ever done
is to explore the drains or climb the mango tree
when i was young
outside my childhood friend's house
my childhood friend is trxia by the way=)
my grp has equal no.of guys and girls
heheh sch life is looking bright
im actually having female sch mates =)))
haha
and the guys in engine must be quite glad
no extended NS where u only see rough faces/voice and
chiselled body for 6 yrs instead of the usual 2

btw i finally see some hope in bgr =)
even angel has stopped being anti-boys
thus i shall learn to accept that bgr
need not be a bad thing
more of my friends are staying tgh
im begining to see that it is possible for ppl to get tgh
and stay tgh .
like for eg.ruth and charlton
tiff and bryan
heh actually theese ppl mentioned dun read my blog
but i just want to show u that theese ppl do exist
yay im so happy for them
and i hope they continue to be an example to
us ppl who are cynical abt such an existance

btw ive made comparisons btw the r'ships that work
and those that dun

those that work have the characteristics as shown
(this is purely my view, frm a person who as nv loved another
frm the opposite sex, so pls take it with a pinch of salt)

1)two whole independent beings with their own
strengths and weakness complementing each other
(v.diff frm the notion of u complete me kinda thing=)))
yay so happy , goes to show that god made us whole in him
im wonderfully made and he has made me whole , a mate wld be
an extra gift =).thus we wouldnt have to be emotionally dependent
on our mates and be trapped in a mangled mess
because our ultimate source of stregth is god

2)......haha ok i dun know alr , need to do
more observations and research =)
lols all the best to them. i like what i see=)))))

2008-06-28T06:03:00.000-07:00

mings was walking down town with her
rather old sch mate (2yrs and counting)
nu qiang ren(muscle women in chi) singning
where they witness
women with special children with special needs
people who were limping
beggers on the streets
tt made the walk v. hard to handle
cause the images refuse to go away
mings was extremly displeased with herself
when she was thinking in her head
"whoa im so much better than them"
"so much luckier"
"why did god make me luckier than some ppl"
she wanted to kick herself
for being so elitist
mings turned to singning and
poured her heart out
and sing brought mings back to reality
"in this world such things always happen"

another setback
my favourite tv show host , ms oprah winffrey (spelt correctly?)
has a twisted view on christianity
i love her shows and her personality
i belive that she is inherently not a bad egg
and i just cant do anything abt it
i want for her to experience the love
that god has showered upon me

until todae
i found out that since i have no financial means
or te power to change anything
the ans is just to pray
heyy ppl we realli need to get down to pray
and theres so many things to pray about
so many needs
so little prayers
actually i kinda dun like to pray
cause i always thing im only talking to
nothingness
however aft the whole uni saga
ive learnt to trust more
on my heavenly father

im not perfect
my ways may hurt someone
out there even if i dun
intentionally plan for it to happen
but dun dis my haeavenly father
because i havent been a good example
i wish u all the best

2008-06-22T19:45:00.001-07:00

Cui msged me something really random
It went
“Mings!! I miss studying together. Haha…random…”
And its been 8 mths since we last mugged? haha
tt msg sent bouts of sporadic memories slapping
And zooming through my head
Mugging is SUPPOSED to be dreaded
It’s universal
But ive NV had such a fulfilling mugging session
with cui and the ppl whom were attracted to our mugging table !
haha
mugging tgh kept us awake
mugging tgh helped us discover things
we nv knew we didn’t know
Mugging helped us discover each others idiosyncrasies
But most importantly
All these things would not fall in place
If I had another study buddy=)))
Thank you cui !
Mugging was fun cause
No.1
We had such a beautiful ambience
To study in
Place no1 :overlooked the esplanade and marine bay
(dun tell u where haha ..later u find throngs of student scrambling
There to study too!)
That’s the place we watched fireworks in real life
On National day with calvin while mugging
Glorious splendor I tell you
With kids screaming in glee at the background
=)))
Place 2 :The hub
The place we studied from 7 in the morn till 9 at night?
The hub is a place in AC
Where u freeze ur butt off
But u get to meet people whom you never knew
Existed in school
Eg. Legendary study gods who score all As at prelims,the jocks
The artsie ppl ,bimbos,the choir ppl who talk like they are the only ones
In the hub ,models,celebrities in sch,nerds.gangs
Reason no.2
We had community
=)))
Cui invited my friends while I invited mine
In the end friends of friends came to know each other
And because random ppl sat with us
Their randomness became familiarity over time
Its just amazing to see how relationships can take shape
While mugging

I tell u it must be cui’s beautiful personality =)))
Over last sat I met up with my roomie frm ac
And later with my cell
I realized I kept asking them abt wheather witty ppl exist
In ntu and wheather they have personality or not
I realize that ive been hoping for my life at ntu
To be filled with ppl like cui , paul, marcus
And the list goes on
I wish for the same familiarity
The AC SPRIT!(clovis says our sch is haunted ..now u know what he is talking abt)
So much so that I wish everyone was like them
Haha
Yes what an idiot again
Hahah but
I REALLI MISS THEM !

Everyone deserves the right not to be compared to others mings=)
Rem tt

2008-06-18T21:25:00.001-07:00

Grace !(no im nort shouting out for grace ang my co-leader)
I was just questioning myself
What did I do right to secure a place at ntu
My spanking personal statement? my letter to the dean?
And my bro shouted
GOD
Haha
Oh yeah what a idiot I have been
Seriously …my grades are kinda far frm the cutoff
Ive always asked god if my religion was born out of a fable
And if miricles are just strokes of luck
Luck=miricles????
I mean how often do u hear your non-christian friends exclaim
IM SO LUCKY
Now I know miricles are frm god
The voices I heard in my head
In my chem. Examination when I was so
tempted to write my last 3 words
I heard
”honor me and I will honor u”
When
And when ive been fearing the kind of results ill get
I heard”until now u have not asked anything in my name
, ask and you shall be fulfilled”(something like tt)
And when I finally asked god
He replied
“it will come but it would take a long time”
And when I was rejected
He sent angel(how appropriate)
And she said
“you will definitely get it”
At that point I tot she was crazy or a lunatic
Last of all he gave me peace when I asked for it
I stopped worrying since may?
When ive been fearing since I blacked out for my first paper
Till may when I finally found peace within myself
And found my direction again
With god I am nothing

any wae
was reading zx's blog
haha his puppy is called kobe
hmmm sounds delicious
no wonder ppl eat dogs mabey cause they
have names like
milo, creme brule
for their puppies
haha
MMMMMMmmmm yummy

2008-06-13T08:33:00.000-07:00

dear god
mings is at the cross roads
she doesnt want such things to happen if its not your will
somehow this time things are different
and mings wonders if its your will
mings only wanna go oon the route u choose lord
if the decision is not in line with yours
may all the dreams, wishes and hopes dissapear
ahmen

so hard lord so hard
help me FATHER =)))

i just talked to paul !
thks paul

aniwaes i wanna talk to cui so bad
but she s in m'sia=(

AHHH cui are u ok ???

2008-06-11T08:01:00.000-07:00

everything is faster with emails
there are so many enquiries
but human effort cant meet up with
the emails pace
for every job that i quote
theres prolly 50 emails out there that are on
queue for my immediate attention
but i learnt alort theese few days
=))) rather pleased actually
since theres nv ending job
why not do what ever u can handle properly
error -free so everyone wld be happy
and no one can complain=)
MINGS rox

2008-05-21T05:45:00.000-07:00

have u ever been forced to eat something u dun like?
man tt sux rites?=(
i usually throw away/waste food if the food is
nort worth the calories
eg.bad char kuay teow
but if its good for my body
but its not nice
eg.a slightly bruised banana
ill still gladly chomp it down my
alimentry canal/digestive tract.=)

nufff said
todae i played the role of the villian
while my bro
the victimised

i tried cooking lunch and dinner
in the end
for lunch
we had bland beehoon soup
for dinner
-could not be served cause the garlic was burnt
and the garlic soup tasted like charcoal!-
and since my bro was too lazy to shift his butt
to buy his stomache a decent meal
he stomached the bland tasteless beehoon

mmm wad a good boy
when i said"aye ill try again tml ok.dinner"
i think he wanted to cry
cause he yelped out the biggest NOoo in his life
haha
but i seriously think ill be better tml !
aft learning frm the faliures
errr so dinner tml???
haha

2008-05-18T05:42:00.000-07:00

yayayayayayayayay!
sae-width-mee
"loooooong weeek-END"
hmmm i see the glimer and sparkle in ur eyes
nice

holidaes dun come easily when u start workin
religiously frm 8.30 to 6
its like the best present uve ever recieved
from the mysterious person who declared the dae
a holidae =)
who ever the mysterious person is
MINGS IS SO GRATEFUL!

man i wanted to meet up with the concert gang tml
but ah cui is still in exotic russia
russia ! so fun yet so scary !i think shes living out
an adventure right there
(see cui we havent forgotten abt u...ahh come back soon !)
so hokay well push tt back one week!
cant wait.*jumps arnd with squinted eyes n clenched fists*
chiam.cui.chinhong.bong.paul
missin them

whent for church tis morn
todae ,i did what i usually avoid doing
shaking hands ...
the probablity of someone shaking ur hand while u are ushering
is 1/5 =) lols yes
tts why im always gving out the pamphlets
instead.
so many rejection in one dae.haha
the ppl who dun shake ur hands are
1)small boys (i think they are just scared
of any female at their age ...cause i belive
their mummies told them specifically
not to touch any girls)
2) ppl who just came frm the toilet (thank you haha)
3)males(same reasons as no.1)i think its vice versa
for male usherers
4) super shy ppl (super cute ...they walk with their
faces down)
thus the 1/5 belongs to the category of confident unknown
females and males + ppl who call u friend=)

2008-04-27T09:19:00.000-07:00

this is so strange
church is supposed to be the "ideal "place
to meet people whom u can "fellowship" with
but in recent years
ive come to realise
that ppl are conforming to become
the "ideal" christian
who look happy,speak the politically correct
sentences and look diligent in copying
all the notes for sermon that day .
yet they have no love for people
who are slightly geekier or lian/beng or look below average
everybody wants to be in a "perfect" group
of christians where everyone dresses
up nicely ,are funny and have good manners
so lians ,bengs and geeks get sidelined in church
which is so dissapointing
actually i havent been doing much too
i have this lian girl in my cell
who hasnt been comming to church
u noe im typing this so that ill be convicted to
making sure that this life gets saved
together with her lian friends
who dun quite look uniform with the rest of my sec 1 girls

sometimes u feel like they spoil your picture perfect cell
i think we are just being high and mightily bitchy

i sometimes marvel at how fake ppl can be in church
sometimes i feel like running away
i feel that its better to be in the presence
of people who care
rather than a place where people are self -concious
of only themselves .
people who only care about their needs
but not others .
its so sad that non christians are a better
rolemodels
than some christians

rarrr so sry i have to ramble
fedup !

2008-03-31T07:40:00.000-07:00

do i work for my father
or does my father work for me?
haha
that the qn that has been lingering in my mind
why do i hav such a thought ?
my father has been driving me around the whiole day
to drop all my documentations to the various institution
and he insists on sending me around to the local unis
so that the documents dun get lost in the mail
and gets into the wrong hands and place
oh man but im so thankful nevertheless thou i tot
i cld have gone on my own
i guess ill bask in being his little child
and reap the benefits of being an overgrown kid
btw im so happie cause i saw jacko at NUS and ryna at SMU
whee!
tolly made my dae =)))))

i was so tired !
are u tired too?
are u like a typical singaporean like me
who has too much to do in too little time?
take a rest and meditate
i feel tt playing christian music on my guitar
helps strengthen my fatique soul
just repeating lyrics like
"he will come and save you"
is like battery that recharges my weary soul
mabey cause its a source of comfort
=)))
todae i felt like i was drugged !
super tired
haha
and when im tired my jaws drop
my mum was of course not v.pleased
geez haha
i kinda like her priceless expression
just for memory sake

aniwaes i got to know someone better !
a girl FRiend
haha
dun get it wrong
just friends
ive always tot we wld always remain as aquaintances
but its amazing what god is doing in our lives
whee !
my heavenly father nv fails to suprise me now and then =)

I BELIEVE IN CREATIVE HANDS
THE ONE WHO SHAPES MY LIFE
HIS PLANS
AHMEN

2008-03-20T08:12:00.000-07:00

im 19 !
*tries to keep calm*
haha last yr where therees a no.1
in front of my age =)
cherrios to all those who are 19 alr =)))
u brave souls

onli one wish lord : togetherness!

2008-03-09T06:59:00.000-07:00

rcved my results on fri
kinda dissapointed
i took some alone time todae
just jogging with bro
half the time i just walked
and watch the ppl jog/pant/sweat by me
kinda weird that tears didnt
stream frm theese eyes
or at least not yet
alone time is good to sort out ur thinking
to be able to think rationaly
to evaluate
to come to terms with the results
that have stared blankly back at you
alone time is gd

anywaes i love the ppl at AC
all the support aft i rcved my results
thou i had loser grades
i saw scholars with the winning attitude
u noe the scholars cld jolly well
just ignore me and celebrate
but they offered me advice instead
good honest advice
which i feel realli has helped me
superficial friends give u illusive ,sugar coated advice
true friends give u honest feedback
which is better than a kiss on the cheeks
man theese scholars are SING QIAN AND SHUJIA
=) realli proud of them
u noe sometimes i wish Sing qian
will become a policy maker somedae
at least i know s'pore wld be in gd hands

have to thank merilyn(for seeing me home when u cld go shopping !)
,marcus,ziyi,james
for just being with me ...i didnt shed a tear
but i think
they cld see i was disappointed
some of u seemed more worried for me
than i am for my self
haha i was shocked ..ive always been told humans
are selfish by nature=)
just being there to spend time with me was realli sweet !
and thks ziyi for ur autograped
tissue paper !its going into my gifts wardrobe !

Im shocked tt renjie (long jump buddy in sec 3)
wld come and offer me advice
he was last yrs top stud in nyjc btw
and have to thank charlton and sam for the advice too

my ahmah and ahmahs sis were
also there for me
bringing me brands essence of chick
how sweet =)

thankyou all for even investing ur time
on a boderline case
i dun see how i deserved it but yep thks !

btw we hav scholars in our class =))) UNCLE AND CHIN HONG
realli proud of them !

2008-03-02T06:18:00.000-08:00

viewers alert : this post is gonna lack substance
,brainless ramblings ,dun regret u hav been warned

workin life equates to no social life
or the lack of it
RHS equates to LHS
therefore, by mathematical induction ,
p(1.no scial life),p(2.no social life ),p(n.no social life )
is true for all positive integers of n =)

aniwaes my lucky break came
when we went to pauls place to WII (whee!) haha
o.oo and majong
plus hawker cum pizza hut buffet
my arm hurts terribly now
due to wii boxing !
everybody looks bersek
boxing frantically in the air
boxing but no one gets hurt =)
chinhong took vids of us
i wanna watch how retarded we were =))
btw guitar hero and shooting is the best
wii games ive played so far
esp guitar hero ..super addictive
super pro fingerings + remembering to strum (esp noobs like us )
chiam ,xw and paul are like the best amgst us

then came pseudo majong
without the cat mouse centipede and chicken
chinhong won 2 games
yuxiang 1
me 1
haha
chooqi 0!!
haha
majong actually feels like a card game actually
u need 4 sets of 3 family plus 1 set of 2 to HU
form a set of 3 when the person before u throws
the majong u want then u PONG !
hehheh sounds familliar rites HU and PONG
esp in all those kungfu dramas
except tt it is complicated by
flower titles and the compass
ive always imagined old ppl with bad vision playing
it to pass time
nv tot i wld ever ...ever play majong
must be the influence of the rv ppl
...must be !

2008-02-24T05:50:00.000-08:00

i was feeling unhappy
tt my parents were fighting once again
someone pls do tell me fairytale endings
do last

i was feelin emo

untill i tot abt the words that are mispronounced
by eng speaking singaporeans

1) facade ...they sae (fah-car-dey....or fur-charde)
2)cafe....they sae (cave ...haha ...or kk dunnoe alr)
3)salmon ...they sae (sell-mon)
4)milk ....they say (me-ilk)

actually ive been wrong before and
have been corrected tts why i can
look back and laugh...prolly at myself
actually haha
only the first 2 egs tikle me pink

tanchun and i talked abt being roomies in uni !
man i realli hope ill cross this
hurdle and make it to uni!
in my big man i trust
ahhhh the idea is just driving me nuts
haha
chun and me !
cihui and xian ling
whee !
hostel mates !

btw another thing driving me nuts
is ppl giving the A level students false hopes
tt the results are gonann be out
on fri for the last 4 fridays haha
thanks for the added excitment in our lives
thou sometimes i may not appreciate it as much
but still i see ur efforts to cheer us up =)
so ill just sae thankyou aniwaes

2008-02-22T06:56:00.000-08:00

reeeetarrrded!
haha yeah the world is retarded
beacuse i dun get to see crispy and the rest in a week =(
make tt two weeks !
because of lockins,ntu open hus ,airshow tml grrr
im just lazy to go plan class outings in the
aft for tml SRY!
but well hav wii,pizza and majong next week ! promise =)

but i saw althea ,merilyn ,buddy ,the girls
i reliefed the whole week
so hmmm i guess i shldnt complain

mebey i shld stop looking outside
and take care of the ppl 'inside
the house instead
haha hmm outing with my bro ?
seriously if it happens
it wld be our first
just tt i dun see the point of going out
for a meal
when my mum cooks such yummylicious food =)

miss tang(merilyn) girls are soooo cute
we were just parading arnd the sch to chill
our brains
plus pass msges (like hw) to our classes
misss tang girls wld stop her every 100 steps
to get her to try their spegetti (home econs girls)
complain to her
talk to her
haha
althou some are taller than her !
but nevertheless
i kinda like what i see
i like a loving environment
where ppl love each other
like how miss tang loves her students
and how her students love her
i love going back to sch
because the environment is so nurturing

anywae aft the horror live lesson i had with the
class i took the last time where everybody
fought to ans ,and they left me
haha nort being able to hear myself .
i learnt to use my bright beautiful goldfish big eyes
to draw their attention =)
i feel happy bacause i covered an
important live topic on respect
i just wanted to expose them to whats happening in the world
like what mrs lum did when we were in sec 4
i enjoyed listening to her i rem
i tried to show them
how ppl have nort learnt how to respect each other's religion race
sex,status in the pass and in a mordern soc such as ours
i had fun seacing out info abt the holocaust and the k.k.k
i was also learning in the process=)
im preety idealistic
i hope tt our generation of hate
can become a generation of love
i hope theese girls can make a diff in each others lifes
one aspect i feel extreamly accomplised was to talk
to them on the sub of bullying
its been a topic that realli
pulls at my heartstrings
mabey because im sadden to see it happening
amongst adults in the work place ?
ppl dun seem to grow out of it
its heartbreaking for me to watch
ppl lifes being ruined in the process
physical scars aint nothing compared
to emotional ones
i pray tt god will convict me quickly
shld i ever want to hurt anybody
set the ppl free

btw im amused by the ppl arnd me haha
-andy is suddenly so enthu abt class outing
-josh seems to be talking abt everybody older than him
haha quite jealous of him actually
so many god parents ! haha
-merilyn being miss sunshine to her students=)
-althea popping up in my life out of no where
-crispy finslly being a special education volunteer!so so proud of her
-tan chun talking to me over the phone for 3 hrs straight
...which was super cool
i havent done such stuff for soooo long !

man god ! i love theese ppl in my life
sometimes thinking abt them just makes me
feel so blessed!

2008-02-11T06:31:00.000-08:00

we have just herald in a highly commerciallised dae/event
but nobody is complaining i guess
haha do u dare complain in front of
ur date ?
i love special occations
it helps to take the load of us
after going through weeks of
drudgery/routine work
something to look forward to
as it is usually a time for ppl to meet
experience and liberate

been thinking of AC and the things that we used to do
if we rewind the clock back by six mths...this
is prolly what we wld experience

-looking lost on our phones trying to find each other
in the void deck /canteen ,every girl seem to hav bangs /
skinny stick like legs
and every guy spiky hair /shaved heads

-buying every newly designed AC shirts ,even thou we alr have
enough Ac t-shirts to be worn for breakfast lunch and dinner
7 days a week

- class guys
1)ponning miss toos remedial for the soccer fields and
getting caught when she looks out of the STI
- making
retaded comments spontaneously at any one time
2) losing their pocket money on soccer like hha always ?
3)realli impressed by their determination to work hard for
NAPfa ...how did u think we gort the FITTEST CLASS award=)..free
bbq for our class as a reward
4) being clowns of the class ,class wld seriously be dead without them
(we have the cute :mike lai ,the queer inventor/destructor:yuxiang,
the uncle : clovis ,the love birds: mark and rich
,the too cool for sch :andy and weemeng
the aunti killers : paul and mike yue , the haphazard: naveen
the comm pro : chinhong ,the blind follower : chooqi ,im sry if i left out anibody

trackers kana knocked out by practicising soccer boys
while running ...worse still for the jumpers ..the soccer
post is situated in front of our territory.
the jumpers are constantly
on the lookout for weapons/flying balls
the soccer tchr(my pe tchr)
personally knocked me out a few times
no wonder he looks apologetic every pe lesson haha

still rem being realli amused by effiminate guys
sometimes ill just observe them and laugh
still rem some effiminate guy saw me laughing
at his actions and thought i was expressing interest
tt was realli cute,i nearly got
myself into trouble

going high at every celebration including cny/national dae
every celebration is truly festive because
everybody is retarded ...fun>image...
esp with the boistrous sb5 girls haha

observing all sorts of ppl ..bimbos..
lackadiacical..witty
ppl who smoke and glides thru the most
impossible situations with tchrs...cheena..
well off...well dressed...elegant..outspoken
...crazy...funloving ...trouble makersdramaqueens/kings
..nerds..schlors..all rounder sportsmen/women..musicians...effiminate...
basically everything and i cant condemn them
althou we have all sorts of taggs for them ..
they colour our school life ...
and change our perspective
and take our emotions on a
rollercoaster ride
i feel that life begins at ac

when our class went for cip in batam
,i still rem singning rudely waking us up
(by leaving us cold without a blanket) n
the whole near ghost encounter which left
chiam and i
screaming down the hallway haha
in the end chiam and i forced ourselves
into jo and singnings bed thou it was
a single bed n it was without
warning or permission haha
leaving them
squeezed
in the end we had picnic in their room =)
chiam and i had no regrets/qualms leaving our
hundred pluss per nite accomodation abandoned
still rem the guys buying the brightess biggest
shells for their crushes/gfs
thou some nv found the courage
to present their gifts
aniwaes i tot they were realli sweet

it was the girls who taught me how to love =)
had quite a bad experience with some
girls my batchmates @ pl prefectorial
board i was scarred ..nv felt so hurt
in my life aft tt i always felt
inferior,rejected,alone
i lost myself,i told myself i was a misfit
i condemned myself
if many ppl are agst me then something
must be wrong with me rites?...
i tot AC wld be worse but i find myself
being able to love more freely and
overcoming my fears i think comming
to AC was a release for me
i was even able to tell them how loser i was
but they still love me the same
i think tt was how i recovered im so happy =)
i bet u nv knew u were such great doctors
thks for helping me love again
love u girls
i saw how our class patched up
their r'ship with miss too
i was stunned
i was happy
i found hope in ur examples
(i wanna thank cuiwen,jojo,
sing,san,chiam,qz,clovis.
chinhong,mark,rich n shilin for tt =)

and i nv loved any other class like sb6

happi v dae !

2008-02-01T18:33:00.000-08:00

starting work on fri is weird
i keep thinking tml is mon or sumthing
haha
yay ! i relief teached @pl on fri
my cell girls are so cute larz
they were so confused
as to how they shld adress me
they were like fighting with each other
wheather i was miss tong or mingxiu
i kinda pefer mingxiu thou =)

wha kk i met my buddy and her friend
u noe the buddy we had when we were pri 5?
then our buddy was some inncocent lookin pri 1 kido ?
wha haha they are like so big alr
sec 3 alr ...
i mean in my mind they were nv so tall =(
haha
ahhhh my buddy is still so dark !
i think tts the onli trace tt is still the same
in lee hwang
its so beautiful ...a reunion i nv imagined
wld take plc

im some unsentimental fool
haha seriously
as in i do forget ppl easily
unless i was realli close to them
if not ill be realli guarded
agst them

some of the pri sch trackers .now in sec sch recognise me
and they came up to chat me up=)
i learnt soemthing frm them man
even thou u dun realli know somebody
u can always give a cheerful greeting
to brighten up the day of tt person
no need to feel weird
no fear of rejection

wha kk i feel like ive learn so much frm theese girls
in just one day
time for me to be more loving man

as we grow up ppl become more guarded
more cynical ,more judgemental ,more critical
less happy,less satisfied(like i see at my fathers work plc)
its time to hav more childlike faith ,childlike love
its time for me to return to the time
where loving was natural
and free
restart .

2008-01-26T08:37:00.000-08:00

i extend my leisure hrs
by sleeping later and waking up super early for work
im preety much like a walking corpse haha
eeeerrrr
aniwaes ..been watching HWANG JIN YI
online =)
i cried by eyeballs out
so much so i had sore eyes
but the ending is realli bad
nort worth my 1 hr =(
but overall great drama cause ive nv been more addicted
in yrs
yep lifeless me =)
buttts happy can alr !

have u observed say in a nursery
when a child cries
some children on auto mode wld cry spontaneously
with the distressed child
taking upon the other childs distress as their own
some wld just look at the child blankly ,with much indifference
some wld pat the child to soothe the wailing child
i say emphaty is inborn
dun believe in tabula rasa
where ppl are born like as if their minds
were a piece of white paper
ready to to vandallised by expereinces
aniwaes ...i was just observing haha
dun need to take it so seriously

my weekends are spent in church
much has been gappening in church
like the TNG launch tml=)
nellyn and i wld be spastic ushers tml waiting to
be bashed
cause our job is to keep the ppl comming thru the back door quiet
tts like haha how hard larz
not my mouth
but yet i hav to seal them
haha
back to the prefect daes !
i hav my ways =)
i hav a small cell tgh with the nurturing and attractive hot mama RACHel
and the smart head prefect of cedar GRace
we hav 11 kids =)
all v.cute (they are actually the sentosa kids i wanted
to scream at haha)
their mean psle score is a whooping 254 point
yep !
sample of the qns they ask
1)does god hav a father ?..how did he appear
...he has a father rites ..how old is he
2) how come we hav so many races ...i tot the
world started out with adam and eve ?
3) we come frm monkeys rites ... i rem i read it
somewhere
4)how come ...how come ....rarr can rem but they
were flooding us with qns
haha but realli interesting stuff they came out with i sae
our girls are thinkers !=) proud of them
and im glad we were able to come up
with the ans
with kaifengs help of course =)

2008-01-19T05:21:00.000-08:00

i realised that im happier with work
thou i hardly find it satisfying
communicating with the com
i look forward to weekends
and i do a five dae countdown
everydae at work
at work i do a 9 hr countdown
well u see im bz counting down all the time
when the week end greets me
i finally get a taste of real freedom
and i get the thrill out of it

what keeps me at a boring job
is the challenge to preservere
just to challenge urself how long u can tahan =)
at the expense of a life
seriously dun need the money so much
but it wld be good to hav some
savings for uni thou=)

i hope ill get my adhoc relief
teaching from pl soon =)
realli wanna work with the kids
if i cld later in the few mths i wld love to do some waitressing
or something Fand B related (my dream job since i was a kid )
esp at some jap restraunt
i wanna learn how to serve
how to decorate the food with the plates
how to attract customers to come back to eat
so exciting rites =)
all of tt is what i wanna do b4 uni
im so jealous of timothy the bah ku teh boy at church
!hes bz and meeting ppl all th e time =)

btw the lady taught me some stuff at work !
like finally
i didnt have to irrate her 8 times like i had planned
initially haha
whoo i had prayed abt this ,i prayed for wisdom at work
how to deal with ppl and other stuff
and all i can say is tt
GOD ANS PRAYERS =)
i make it a point to pray tt prayer everydae b4 work

btw i had the chance to msg ppl frm sch the whole week
it feels good to irritate the ppl u care abt =)

heyy all u ppl ! happy working
dun make enemies
learn and try not to make mistakes
and yep trust always in god =)

2008-01-16T07:12:00.000-08:00

haha u noe ppl still are very insecure at hmmm say 30+++ mabey 40
my superior is realli scared to teach me stuff=)
accounting stuff actually
mabey shes scared tt she wont be of use to the company
aft i learn the ropes frm her
btw the boss has indicated tt he wants me to be productive
and shes supposed to be my sort of teacher

so im like bored !
out of the 9 hrs im supposed to work
abt 5 hrs is spent either watching her work
or stonning =O

yeah man u sure dun wanna be a stone
in ur next life if u believe in recarnation
aft going thru this
the world passes by as u waste secs ,mins,hrs,eternity...
by the way!
for all u there who believe in recarnation
seriously how can recairnation exist
when the world is expanding in population ???
go figure !
try to enlighten me pls thks

btw i intend to irritate her
irritate her until she teaches me
todae i asked her 5 times for a job to do
at the 5th time i cldnt tahan alr
i mean u study till the a levels to
be paid to stone
aint it a waste of ur brains
and all the physical strength tt god has endowed u with ?

heres how it went
me:so aunty ******* can i finally have some work to do
me :i hav nothing to do and im so bored i cld sleep now
me:how abt the completion of the invoice tt was signed
this morn ?
her:errr ....cannot larz need to check one
me:i can help u do tt just hav to teach me
her: (stop fpr a momet to think of a reply )...errr nothing larz ...oooh
actually hav larz but its v boring
her:u see the 3 files there? yeah just seperate the double side paper frm
the single sided one
me:yay ! finally

man yeah man at least i was able to contribute
by doing rather brainless work

but heyy nort going to waste my time away
im gonna learn accounts !
lets up tmls pestering to 8 times !
if it doesnt work then every 5 mins haha
see who cannot tahan first
can u imagine if the boss sees me slacking 9 hrs away
aiyoh more trouble

2008-01-14T07:05:00.000-08:00

heres a song tt we all wld hav though
about sometime in our lives
to hav some fun u cld laugh at the
lyrics and exclaim"ahha loser "=)
or u cld get all emo momo over the lyrics
haha yeah just get in touch with ur inner being
(yeah like gays do i guess)

tell me what love is ?
what can it be
what is this yearning
burning in me
will i survive it
will i endure
this is my sickness
is there a cure

first this obsession
seizing my brain
starting in passion
ending in pain

i start to shiver
then im on fire
then im a quiver
with seething desire
who hold the secret
who hold the key
i long for something
what can it be

my brain is reeling
i wonder why
and then the feeling
im gonna die
by dae it haunts me haunts me by night
this tender yearning thinged with delight

repeat
repeat
haha
repeat until u are happy

u noe .ive grown up to be quite skeptical abt love
i look at my mums friends
ALL of which are on the verge of
breakdown or divorce
anywaes all u women
be independent
financially (hav some part time job )
mentally(keep in touch with ur realli good friends)
spritually(hav god in ur hearts ,cause his ur compass when u are directionless)

why do r'ships breakdown ?
so far frm the real life egs ive seen
-religion ,or rather the diff
-addiction(gambling,lets add drinking ,womanising to the list )
-woman more capable than the men ,and the guy is realli sore

im ok with mixing with guys
but nort going deeper than tt
i can be realli judgemental towards them
if i dun like ur characer
ill just ignore u
until i see tt u posess the qualities of
a friend
and nort just flirting arnd
ill give u the same respect u show me

im afraid of the commitment
everytime some guy tries too hard
ill draw my self further away
i noticed tt
in the end its realli akward ..i realli wished we
could just hang out
without feelin weird

in Ac it was much better
isimply lauged it off
nv took theese ppl seriously=)
like tt alort
just plain friendships
im realli comfy with tt
yay!i think im maturing =))

women hav been too dependent on man i feel
ive been feelin angsty
im sorry theese things(mums friends marriage troubles)
have been occuring
abit too frequently

women hav issues with each other too
its scary
esp when theres bitchin and catfight involved
humans are carnivorous and they eat each
others hearts and minds

good friends are hard to come by
realli hav to treasure the ppl u love
better to hav few and realli good friends
then many but superficial ones=)
im proud to sae i have
3 ppl i call good friends
i noe its realli little but
haha i dun care !
but i care when im realli lonely of course
but meanwhile im realli thankful
thk u god for ur provision =)

2008-01-10T02:24:00.000-08:00

went over to my mums mother's sisters place yest
to shorten it
i went to my ah yees place
went to go play with ruien(3 yrs old ) and jun jie(4yrs old )
the looked realli adorable sleeping on the hamock looking thing
they were half awake when i was there
when they saw us they cried
aiyoh so poor thing didnt mean to tramatise them =(
lols man just 1 mth
and we hav become strangers
children hav such short term memory
they cant rem the girl who helped them assemble
their police car ?=(

so they hid frm me haha like behind anything they can find
with their heads protruding out
realli adorable
aft a brief hostility frm their side
the next thing was screaming frm them
because they were so excited to play
they cant speak ,so they scream =)
it was my turn to be tramatised =O

played some bowling ,pretend to be fisherman games with them
boys tend to destruct
and girls doesnt seem to hav the instinct to do so
try the bowling game with both genders
the guys need not to be told how to play the game
its instinctive
the girl instead wld be more interested in placing the pins upright
aft 5 prompting
the girl still doesnt show any aggresion towards the pins!

little boys seem also to be less sticky
i was shocked to see rui en running towards me she hugged my leg
and pressed her cheeks on them when she needed protection
i was slightly not used to it ,a bit freaked out
its onli possible cause she is slightly taller than my knee=)
man yep my encounter with short ppl
when she does tt
it looks like a human growing out frm my shin =)

rarrr working tml=( everybodies so serious and are older than me ...man
let me teach them a thing or two abt loosening up=)
hahah in my dreams ah!

2008-01-06T07:09:00.000-08:00

feel kind of displaced aft As ,miss sch badly =(

i miss having to wake up early
i miss disturbing the ppl in my class(eg being the pimptress when the girls all decide to pon sch tgh ...and i the class rep still hav to go to sch ...sighhs haha) and the class in front of us (eg monster ...monster and monster..althou our class girls always kana wacked by aunty)
i miss having long chats (like the girls in our class can tok frm the time we enter sch ,all the way through assembly until sch starts =)
i misss the girls badly ...but we are meeting up this fri which is a relief
i miss laughing at insecure fairy xiangwei or michael lai
or enjoyed listening to ever entertaining stories abt life with a dose of swearing frm chiam(rem how she sweared at the fields ..was damn funny ...one of a kind ) and cuiMAN(this one swears neh neh..=)
the protection frm jojo (my ah mah )
all the daes we laughed at qianzhi for pointing at the haze???and watch her gasp "oh my god"
i love laughing at the chang and eng buddies in our class aka andy and weemeng who smoke thru any punishments with their "im too cool for sch "attitude and "ey mdn mdm......."
i am entertained by certain personalities in our class like uncle aka clovis who strokes his not so evident..invisible? goatee and think like someone 5 times his age ...he is someone who has a v.gd listening ear =) good to share deep thoughts with him ...and michael yue who reminds us daily how hot he is ...or mark who onli has time for his mistress aka bird
i am shocked ttt our class girls climb the sch gate v.well not minding if there are any guys around haha
im suprised tt ive onli seen andy awake for abt hmmm 8 plus hrs for the whole two yrs
i misss miss too for being such sport when cui and i shock her while she goes abt her daily activities when she lest expects it
i miss miss yue for chiding us abt "acting cute in front of our parents " and to "see beyond our make believe hand made binoculars"
i miss mr ongs pe lessons cause tts when our class realli gets to bond
i miss my cca esp jumps =) (ziyi,jane,joshua,daniel and james for ur friendships )
oh and the other trackers like lih yuan ,joel ,angel ,melcher,shengyang for putting a smile on my face everytime i see u
man many many more like the ppl like david and lydia (sr buddies tt went to ac with me )
mannnnnn the list goes on
but i shall stop here
I MISSS!

2008-01-03T00:48:00.000-08:00

mannnnnnnnn i just met the MOST unfriendly singaporean in my entire life(realli entire nort joking.shes the lady working at the crestar building at sr near my hus (Some body brave shld make another rk house video out of tt *hinty hint) ok tt was super mean ..dun do tt... theres like 6 ladies there ..dun think ull figure out who tt meannie is

is is how we met ...my mum wanted to make sure tt the part time maid doesnt overwork ...we didnt hav a watch so my mum forced me to go to the crestar building to ask for the time (u noe the place looks like a cc,with childcare and kids prog ,but its obviously more profit motivated )

kk so i just went in to ask for the time
me:im sorry to disturb but may i know what time it is now
her: stares at me with those goldfish eyes(this time my heart trembled)
me:*flash a smile
her :WHERE ARE U FROM ?!!!+gives me the disdain look
her :GROWLS (man she growls ....this is the first time i hear somebody who growls so spontaneously akin to ur pet dog...then again pets are alot cuter baceause they can be tamed )
me:im sorry but i wanna make sure my maid doesnt overwork,u know its nort fair to her if we go home late
her :mumbles v.reluctantly 4 something
me:sry cant hear u did i hear 4 something
her:growls again
me:*damn scared alr so ...i said thank u ...man did i sae thank u????and smile ..i must be mad

man cant she just tell me the time? i was emotionally unrepairable for like 10 mins ...u noe even the aunties on the streets are much kinder than u are ...and u didnt even wanna tell me the time properly .

man all the courtesy campaign hav gone to waste ...that lion tt sings and dance on tv is just a mascot to u ....not an ideal of kindness.

if there was a ministry of kindness ,ill be the first to wanna be the first to work there ....alll offenders (esp those in the scv sector)
shall wear that mascot costume and parade them selves by shaking hands with the elderly in the lao ren yuan and sing and shake their hips and dance for them for at least 2 hrs !hurmpff

2007-12-27T09:11:00.000-08:00

walked home with mummy with all tt heavy pots and pans tt my mum bought @orchard istean private sale...the private sale aint private at all ,there were so many ppl and so little space =( felt like sardines in a can ,the queue was long like a snakes and i abhor snakes .....

tts nort the main story actually

todae as i was walking home ...there was this indian kid in the arms of his maid ...he stared at me with those eyes tt cld melt ...he stretched out his little hands and tried to reach out for me =) he said with enthusiasm "JIE JIE JIE JIE " man ...so spontaneous ...i think the world needs more children like him who reminds us of how we shld treat others ...no preconcieved judgements ,no jealousy ,just sincerity =)

i wanna be a person of character ....let nort my heart be hardened so tt i can be shapped by god ...im longing for u dear lord ...hav u seen uncle allan ? he radiates ...always so happy and so enthu abt god ,always trusting in him ...i wanna be like tt =)

2007-12-24T20:20:00.000-08:00

had a blast yest ! haha i caught up with chun in the morn (tan chun actually ,surname tan, name :chun )lols yes shes affectionately known as chunny to the pl lites .tan chun is still the same ,no worries =) and like aunties we still reminience abt the past ...i sweared not to eat ayam penyet (smashed indo fried chicken ) cause i fell sick immediately the last time i had tt but fate came into my way haha chun decided to eat there !kk i decided to be brave and try it again to see if my throat is immune to super fried stuff...this time thou i cheated cause imediately drown my throat with lang tae (cooling tea) aft the meal.anywaes i had fun ...girls being girls ..its amazing how we can not meet for 2 yrs and still be able to find a toic to talk abt frm 1-6 pluss ! orchanrd is a great place to meet up long lost friends ,mainly the ppl whom u did not plan to go out with ,within a span of 2 hrs it is possible to meet up with 4-5 ppl u havent seen in a long time ,saw miss too ! haha bei yi ,ruoyi and a couple of couples frm ac yest .

when it was dawn my mum dragged us to her friends house ,we hopped on to the car then she said "aaye walk larz ,its v.near" this time we sighedd cause we had agar agar,chocos and wine in our hands ,v.heavy ...we just wanted to whine and complain ,she didnt tell us how near is near ,but she was kind to our feet cause her friend happens to be our neighbour who lives the next lane and abt 100 meters away frm us .yay i was happy ....got to know their kids =) v.humble and v.down to earth ppl whom u can click with quite easily their daughter is a doctor in training +) (cool rites they sae tt they will give us free medical treatment as good will ...lols but we are gonna be strong =)))she definetely caught my attention with her personality ,a quiet demeanour but confident ...i havent met anyone like her ...its impossible to make enemies with her actually i think .their son is my age ,he is definetely an aunti killer ,haha someone like paul but abit more man ...like my bro ....v.gentlemanly.singapore is seriously v.small !cause i happen to know 2 of his friends frm hashims econs class,that helped quite a bit to break the ice =)i think ....good children are the products of good parents ,i enjoyed listening to aunty lynette and her husband ,thou i do not know them ,they offered us good advice abt life ,i mean i havent met anybody in a long time who gives me sound advice .....tts my fav christmas gift this year ... !

2007-12-22T10:39:00.000-08:00

IM so glad i dun think the church peeps can find or read my blog ,i mean if u happen to chance upon it then err haha just my luck .

u noe when i think of my spritual walk with god ill label it as dry ....derks as in instead of being filled with the sprit im emotionally drained when i go to church .thus i dun think im gonna commit to being a cgl for now if i wanna commit im gonnan commit for at least 4 yrs .at least must watch them grow till they r sec4 =) i need 2 mths to pray abt it

why am i emotionally drained? hahah many factors i guess
-ive watched toomany of my cgls leave
-i feel tt the ppl arnd me dun realli care abt god except for the few ppl like gen ,rach whom i hang out with(with them i finally feel like im going to church)
-ppl are kinda cliquish(eg.rj gang) ,and there arent many ppl my age or older than me ,sometimes i feel alone when my cell aint arnd .

but then again ,kk im nort so alone i guess when i look at my convos im talking to joel,jon .c and tim heyy nort bad wat but dunnoe whats been bugging me .

mabey god wants me to change church ?
todae as i walked into my parents church i kinda cried a little in my heartt,ive nv felt so much peace for so long ..i know in my heart tt gods presence saturates tt place...man i was just walking! i recognise tt feeling ,its the feeling i get when i feel touched by god ....but i dun understand 2 diff church but i get 2 diff feeling ones heavy the other is light whats happening?...how strange ...davin walked up to me todae to join coos sr camp! and it clashes with plmcs sr camp...is god creating tt window of opp?i mean i dun realli know davin and he was rooted behind me with all the forms .baaaaaaaaa kk

if i join coos ...ill be more spritually filled and start off as a nobody
if i continue with plmc ill learn to grow as a cgl and watch my girls grow which is rewarding ...but at the expanse of my spritual growth

in times like this ....pray !i dun like to be wishy wasshy and dun want to

2007-12-16T00:56:00.000-08:00

with regards to my last post ...i feel dissapointed with myself ...did i sae ill abandon them with all tt sarcastic undertones ? rarrr but then again i dun hav the patience and i feel they might be better off under another leader who has a soft and gentle sprit ...at least i know i cant do this on my own and i dun want to ever have to hurt their feelings when they annoy me.i think their souls are v.fragile so yeap =)well see abt it who knows mabey this is gods challenge for me ..to stick with them and help them to grow over the next ????yrs (WHAA...kk im scared)

2007-12-14T06:14:00.000-08:00

back frm jr camp as a facilitator frm sentosa ....
when i prayed for patience with theese kids,i had more than what i had bargained for with those 4 bossy pri 6 girls who obviously have v.protective parents who constantly watch over their every move to make sure their golden toes do not lay foot on *oUCH sand (mind u ,sentosa has loads of theese),make sure the sprinkling of the watering cans of the skyes do not melt them to reduce them to an even tinnier frame,make sure they do not visit a public toilet for fear of HANTAI (i learnt frm them tt tts the word for all perverts out there young or old ),whoose fav tagline is "please can u continue to give in to us ? "and girls who giggle and keep to themselves and are terrified of boys ...my prayer for them is realli to become more rugged as they grow up ,to embrace challenges and to have more initiative ...it was tiring cause they need constant attention and loads of instruction but quite an eyeopeaner =) at least i have a better idea of how i wanna bring up my kids in the future ...what kept me sane were the older kids =) man if i get those girls for cell i will.........i willllll ....seriously cry. cause i hav a strong feelin tt they will be in my cell ...but pls god ....dun lehs.but thank you for sustaining me through this camp =) i was overjoyed when keane asked me how i cld be so patient with theese girls or when shawn thanked me for being his leader .....man we all need encouragement to move on in life ...i havent thanked my parents for taking care of me for the last 18 yrs ..im sure ive been a pain many times in their lives =)

moral of the story is :DO NOT PRAY FOR PATIENCE IF U ARE NOT UP FOR IT

u noe it still amazes me how we managed to remian top 5 for all camp activities(except war game) even tho we were physically challenged ,we were the group tt were able bid for the most items available with our points ...when i look at the other grps ...im convinced tt i must be dreaming =) aniwaes tt doesnt matter cause we are all happy=)

aniwaes my dream child wld hav a passion for life and the things tt he or she does ,loves challenges ,love life and the people of the world ,RUGGED,love god n his parents,have higher than avg eq and iq=)there there aint u jealous of my dream child? haha

2007-11-29T05:32:00.000-08:00

been working at the CIA fair at suntec city as a exhibitor ...my job is to collect name cards and to give out phamplets ...cause im skilless compared to the sales engineers of course =) ...sobs SKILLLESS...aniwaes

whats interesting abt the job is that ...i get to meet people from diff parts of the world ....siemens sent 2 german intern girls to help out at our booth ...man they were tall ,confident and sexy haha..they were v.friendly and i did enjoy listening to them at the irish pub aft work (beer was free for all exhibitors, heineken was free ...and i hav to say the germans realli love their beer the girls had 2 glass of beer each ! shocking stuff )..well i was gd and washed down the chips with pineapple juice=) ...by the way the german engineers talked really fast ,it would give me a perpetual headache to try to decipher what they had to say thou some of the words did sound similar to english .in the engineering industry ,ull be treated like god if u were a german engineer ..they say that german engineering is the best in the world !

there was this itallian woman at the other booth trying to get the singaporean girl to understand what she had to say ,it was so heavily accented that only the polish girl at our booth understood what she was trying to express ,the most ridiculus thing was that the itallian lady shouted at the sales girl "CAN U PLS SPEAK PROPER ENGLISH " whoa , go figure !

sometimes i recieve namecards that are so preety ,but totally uncomprehendable cause they are in arabic ,or in some strange langauage from some far away land .the name cards keeps me entertained when im realli bored

man it was tiring(10 to 6) ! plus my uniform is kinda ugly ..haha ill rather wear my sch uniform to work if possible ...uncle johan and uncle danny were complaining too ...so yeah its always more desirable if there are people who feel and think the same way you do =)))OUR UNIFORM IS UGLY !!!

all the machines there are so complicated ,u noe there is this simple machine that works solely on the priniciple of the flemmings left hand rule and it cost thousands of euros ! the simple stuff that are sold there are like ur testtube shakers ,large complicated linked up to many other burettes kind of burettes that are abt my height and 1 m wide...man it is a whole new world out there .

2007-11-26T09:24:00.000-08:00

FATHER i really wanna teach at PL ! but the site keeps failing me ............keep tt job for me n jojo lehs...they keep asking me for my expiry date for my nric...but aint tt the day that i die ?weird application form kk shall try for the 5th time again later .

btw ...why is it tt i hav the urge to go mugg ?crazy me after nearly 7 days i have yet to fully comprehend tt the As are over .aft 2 yrs of fux pas holidays finally having a REAL extended holidae seems unreal ...i need to be wacked gently ...im brittle =).btw the days seems to pass for what seems like eternity. Over the last few days i did quite alort by trying to enrich myself with life skills like cooking and takingcare of my infant cousins and repairing their toys with my cousin joshua but iam still v.bored =)

over the week i have been to
dinner:fish and co with 4b1
cooked:beef stew,veggie,steamfish ...the std stuff
attended:sans deepavali class gathering ,wedding,church meetings a plenty
planned:class outing ,jr camp calling
babysit :ruien and kai rui ...man im so glad they hav nice temprements ,i just with kairui will stop wacking me with his gun when we are playing police and thief (im the thief)
quality time :with mummy and with god ....i actually havent read the bible in haha hmmm mths ??? i noe im horrible
exercised:with 4b1 again tada

I hav so many things tt keep me occupied but still feel empty ...mabey im feeling lost ....are u feeling lost too? do u ask urself qns like.....so mings where do u go frm here ,u no longer have a sch to go back to ! no cca ...neither do u hav the luxuary of being surrounded and accompanied by the ppl at sch ...ok i shall stop emoing ...man aniwaes thk god for my experiences at AC =) i felt like i learnt quite abit abt ppl (bimbos,himbos,smartypants,cheenappl,ppl who speak v well,the rich the poor,mean pokes,loud,brash ,fun ppl ),life in general in a v.colourful sch ,how u took me out of my comfort zone and how u brought ppl whom i trust into my life ,how i only wanted to feel odinary and not be high profile like i was in sec sch( i wanted to see sch life the way normal ppl do ,minus the stress of being in the limelight ,and all tt sky high expectations) ...thank you for tt i really needed that to help me see things from a diff perspective ...sometimes i wonder how life wld be if i werent class rep ...wld it have been more normal?and how wld being normal normal feel like?....aniwaes im nort complaining i kinda like my job =) thou i had intended for my life in ac to be more normal

2007-09-07T03:55:00.000-07:00

man i just cant stop smiling ,
i see 2 women working in the kitchen tgh (my mummy and ahmah (mums side)).everytime i look of them ,i think of a perfect love
as you read this quote change the word LOVE to (MUMMY AND AHMAH )

“Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. Love does not come to an end.”

just yesterday i was so worried tt mum would leave me at the operating table,todae i see ahmah at our home taking care of mum .

and yeahness ! now tt my mum's back i dun have to do so much housework animore and concentrate on the As ! haha

love is amazing ,its the driving force for us to complete the housework ..its because u care for your family members therefore u take effort to iron their clothes ,so that they look their best and such ...........i finally understood the deeper meaning behind perfection in doing the household chores....but now tt mums back i can take my head off housework =)))))))))))) TIMES a thousand !

aniwaes i realli enjoyed myself studying with yanwen,cui and her sec sch mates,genevieve and her sec sch mates who recognise me =))))) so sweet ....and of course jermanine and lim huizhen =) haha my sch holis was nort so lonely with u ppl

with yan wen ,cui and her sec sch mates you'll just see v.retarded people who are super facinated about v.little things =) i say they just love life

with gen ,janet and (die forgot her name !) ,ull get a choir ! plus international buffet for lunch(gens father is a pilot ,we had german suasuage,salami,gouda cheese,korean eggroe thing with tiny fish ,s'pores nasi lemah and bee hoon ,haha and loads and loads of exotic chocos ) TOtally didnt expect tt ...yep it was quite a spread .plus we sang ! wad a pL thing !

todae miss chee had EXtra math lessons ,man i was darn sad cause i had already planned to study with cui cui =) buts thk god Germs -worms -virus and huizhen came along to save me frm boredom yeahness ! but the two of them ar ...super crazy ....make me wake up at 6 plusss to have macs breakfast with them ,they made the rule tt anybosy who is late wld have to pay for everybodies meal ! of course i was kind to my pocket and went super early ! haha which is like errrr a suprising thing cause i usually oversleep on sat and end up being late for tution ...looks like i care alort abt my pockets ! btw it was refreshing to see siangying and some other pl lites who suprised me with their hi's to me todae while i was mugging furiously =) ...u all made my life of a prefect tt much better ,everytime i was fed up with the politics in the prefectorial board ,your smiles,your silly antics made it so much better =)))) .......actually i wonder who i met todae wld read this! cause i've changed my blog add aft i left pl ...aniwaes i thk you for allowing me to joyfully lead u ppl +)))))) actually my life in PLPB wasnt so terrible aft all !

2007-09-06T01:34:00.000-07:00

here pavarotti sings nessun dorma =)
gd bye sir ,u may now sing with the angels

what an emotive song ,mabey if i understood what he was trying to sing ,i might be lost in the song .actually the version by andrea bocelli is incredible too

now that original pavarotti has gone in peace ,lets usher in the new one ,hes realli good too his name is PAUL POTT ,the sound of his name has striking similarity to the combadian dictator pol pot (i assume im correct....tooo lazy to help u check ) watch this vid ....the story of his life can make u cry , i dun know why but this guy is not as expressive as pavarotti but he delivers the emotion of the song better than pavarotti(pavarotti fans pls dun shoot me !)...mabey its a combination of factors,the look on the audiences faces partly played a role to lead me to this view......mabey his sincerity ..aiyah ...just watch it

aniwaes if u are too cool for crying ,listen to olivia ong(shes s'porean=))))) =) v.good soothing voice ,perfect for a lazy afternoon .listen on imeen

2007-08-03T19:29:00.000-07:00

we discussed during gp abt what makes one happy
among the voices...the audible and the nort do audible ones
ideas like
DOING CHARITABLE WORKS ,BOYFRIENDS,GIRLFRIENDS,interpersonal
relationship with friends ...hmmm actually i find all theese rather temporal
yes even family and even my so called good friends ,ive seen how my friendships with my
pri sch mates wear out with time ,my parents will not be with me forever .without god ill be so insecure .i used to think having a boyfriend might be the solution to brighten uup my life ...but then after looking at all the failed relationships my friends have i dont think its a good idea at all ....people change only god remains .even if i do get into a relationship with the opp gender in the future ,i dont want to bee too emotionally dependent on him ,cause i know that god is my ultimate provider nort the guy

and i was thinking through my last sentence "ppl change ,onli god remains"
memories of gods grace floods my mind,every time i struggled he was always there to send ppl to help me ,oh my i feel so blesssed cause i know the challenges ahead would be exciting because i have the lord my god as my protector and deliverer

2007-07-01T07:57:00.000-07:00

was super duper tired on fri ...haha slept like a piggy in the lib ...studied with wei jian for a bit ...went for track half dead ...was stoning ...i didnt realise tt i was stoning and being absolutely quiet
me:rambling some stuff abt mingxias (hehe notice the striking similarities in our name)sexy hairstyle
lih:wha finally mingxiu is back to normal !
me:what ?im abnormal meh
lih:no but u are finally talking cock
me:cock? do u hav a more refined word ?whats cock anyway
lih: like rubbish larz !

haha om ! i nv knew i was noisy or anything @ track ...............wha quite amazing i always thought i knew myself better than anyone else rarrr apparently not .i try to hide but theyll always find me ....eeeeeeeeRRRRRRRR

2007-06-27T05:52:00.000-07:00

the colours of the rainbows gone
now my sky,has turned to grey
all i have are yesterday
when all was good and well
regret now drowns my weary soul
im nothing but a shell
ive lost the spark tt lit my life
ive lost the tune ive hummed
is this a nightmare that haunts my dreams
or is this reality ?

my heart cries out
with all its soul
for the dream that had to end

dear lord its me again
alone and so afriad
i know its late ,but there are many qns with no ans
i look ahead and see
a future thats so grim
a life that just goes on and doesnt ever have an ending
i used to think ull always be here
i used to think uve come for us somedae
but its been so long since uve been gone
theres nothing i can hold on

are u there lord
do u care
can u ans my prayer
abba father can u hear me
tell me how to believe
cause why does it seem
that its just an empty dream
for i need to know
that youre still here
for me

lord are u just an illusion
somethimes im lost in this confusion
hear our cries
see our pain
hear our prayers
once again
i realli need u now

in my loneliness,u are there,to reveal ur rightousness in my despair ,thks for sending me someone that i cld talk to todae lord..i am weak but u are strong ...dear lord im tired ,hide me in the shadow of your wings

2007-06-21T05:33:00.000-07:00

wails* hear the cries of the 18 yr old baby who refuses to grow up and face the world -tts the long term thing ......i totally admire those innocent looking micro-sized human beings being wheeled arnd in their caravan like moving cots ! pure bliss ...they stare and drool at u while u do likewise back at them ....its like pure sweet love

for the short term -she refuses to believe that her holis are abt to disappear in a flash ! oh man i cant believe how fast the world has moved ......one mth passed so fast ~i cant believe nats is in 2 weeks but sometimes i wish nats was tml eeeeeeerrrr i dun know what i want .

but what i know is tt .............i dun want to be slavedriven by the bks ,wks,notes and whatevernots ...its just too overwhelming !im so glad i hav cui to study with ! and she totally doesnt mind my auntiness!

any waes my buddy(birdy thia!) just sent me a prayer !i shall place it here for ppl who want to pray the same prayer and for me to remind my self of the importance of studying hard

back from church camp! I purpose to love You more. says:
Father i pray that you put within her the discipline and motivation to study so that she may give You the greatest glory. Help her to do her best, as if working for You. Remove every distraction from her and enable her to focus onj whatever she has on hand like her competition and her prelims. Lord, we bless Your name and we know that You will withhold nothing good from those whose walk is
back from church camp! I purpose to love You more. says:
blameless. So we trust You to deliver mingxiu from any fatigue in studying. Protect her physical and mental being also from the evil one. Thank You Lord. In Jesus' name we pray, amen!"

i shall gleem !
i loved the little outing todae=) ,it made my slightly mundane dae tt much brighter .david had a craving for fried mars bars so he dragged us(carol ,me,merilyn ) to the v.japanese central to satisfy his hunger pangs ahhh yes he was pimpin...we went to this jap store to check out all the jap sweets and cakes .....they ahv potato ,corn and milk candy haha its realli quite out of this world ...we were all fasinated .clarke q mrt station is rather out of the odinary i love the floors tt look like the streets and the chairs tt look like a round table for ppl to gather and hav family dinners...hokays i shall logg off now and leave a rather abrupt ending

2007-06-11T09:32:00.000-07:00

gosh its so late now ,and to think tt i badly wanan meet up with jo,clovis and xw tml at 9 am =) i dun know if ill get knocked out soon ...i hope so thou if nort i shall be evil and make them wait till im fully awake ..tsk

aniwaes todaes study session with cui FAILEd due to our lack of any motivation to study .gosh .in the end we just chatted and windowshopped .i was so saddddded(i know this word doesnt exist ,but i feel it tuly brings out what i feel ......ahhh WOrds ) but i ws happy to be free frm the invisible chains of the invisible study ghost who haunts me to study .

plus to add to my sorrows ,the sun and the wind worked together to create this obstacle that prevents the jumpers frm jumping ....our run ups were super haywired cause there was this mixture of head wind ,tailwind and side winds tt made us terribly confused creatures ....

aniwaes i just realised tt sheeps dun hav minds of their own and hav no sense of direction and tts why they need a sheperd over them .i still rem cui telling me abt the herd mentality tt is evident in the behaviour of sheeps ,when 1 sheep falls jumps down the cliff,the whole pack follows suit .......u noe when the bible says tt we are the sheep and gods our sheperd it makes me think of how foolish we humans are...mabey being called a sheep is a degretory term....aniwaes im glad tt god is my sheperd ,every time i choose to take control of my life ,i always seem to go the wrong way ,now i just wanna follow his commands and live out the destiny he has for me ....if he doesnt want me to be in a relationship with a non christian so be it , if he wants me to to be in a certain job in the future so be it ,i just know tt im safe in gods plans .sometimes i just dun understand ?i mean i still dun understand ,but im sure he has a beautiful plan .it is so so hard to go against what u truly wanna do ,without being restricted .buts in him i trust

2007-06-10T06:28:00.000-07:00

this holis has been ..............TIRING !!!!

but rather rewarding

ive been stuck STUCK with some crazy ppl in track (lIke kho ziyi ,who comes up ping and pong jokes-actually sometimes i wonder if im just laughing at ziyi for being ziyi or is her jokes realli tt furnie ?cause i find tt im the only one laughing ?=)

hmm nort to mention lihyuan who finds the need to bathe 3 times more than an average person

...the fairfield PRImary jumpers are a wild bunch ahhhhh they invade our pitt ,they are a super accident prone grp of ppl who long jump on top of one another ,they destroy the pit tt we maintain every week by moving the sand to build sandcastles,they are being lead by their shorter than the girls his age vice head prefect who is by no means any better than the above mentioned characteristics...actually they are rather adorable (it is a rather subjective word i realised) ...tsk ive upgarded frm being their aunty no.1 to ahmah .by the way they affectionately call ziyi .... aunty no.2 (dunch u think ahmah sounds much better than errr haha aunty?)... at least they add tt bit of fun to our training

hmm i realli wanna spend some time with my classmates but they hav been so bz with their performances =( aniwaes im gonna call cui later to see if she wanna study ...btw can someone PLS SCREAM AT ME TO STUDY ! i hav been a lazy piggy ,realli slow to pick up the pen and then i end up doodling like on my v.precious supply of rough paper gasp !!!!!!

i camped at grannies the whole week =) again STUCK with the little imps(joshua,andrea,audrey and judith) ...... this is where the fatique sets in ...children or rather brats nv seem to get tired of playing the same repetitive games like hide and seek for 5 consecutive daes ....i just try to be enthusiastic abt finding them in the same places ..surprise suprise ...worse still ....they dun allow me to take breaks...so mean hor ,andrea cries when i stop playing with her ! she cries like haha hmmm at least 10 times a dae !plus she kicks me in bed in the wee hrs of the morn ,sometimes i find her feet so close to my face !i mean hmm tt wasnt a v.friendly gesture haha .my granny rocks i wonder how she lives with my little cousins who constantly need love and attention .u noe how ive always wanted to tell my ah mah how much she means to me ...thankfully ! i managed to sit those kids down and make a card as a token of appreciation for our ahmah together with them =) being typical singaporean who is inapt in expressing our love we tried our best to sabo each other to get the other party to hand the card to ah mah and tell her all the mushy stuff...lols.....buts i had fun with those brats plus i picked up a thing or two abt handling kids =) aniwaes moral of the story is ....dun get married out of the wedlock ...imagine having to study and having a child crying 24hrs for ur attention !ahhh rittes ull cry louder than the child

i feel so wasteful aft living @ahmahs plc... i nv ever had to use dirty clothes water(dirty clothes water) to flush the toilet bowl at my own hus . i tried to hunt for dirty water in my hus butts alas to no avil..i realised tt we use the washing machine..so sry no dirty rather stinky water

2007-03-31T19:29:00.000-07:00

hehe surprised? i swore nv to touch this blog and let it die in peace but bordoom gets the better of me .so TOUCH TOUCH TOUCH TOUCH ! haha shiok !

im a victor..know why? like some ppl ive been trying to fill up the methodist walk card year in yr out for 11 years haha rarrrrr didnt make it 12 yrs cause im a 2nd intaker but IM GLAD ill onli hav to do it once in acjc .its soooooooo hard larz everybody says tt ac has too much money so they are more than reluctant to donate .i dun rem having so much probs when i was at pl =) was ez peasy .just smile and ka-ching !ull get the donations.

rarrrr guess who my biggest donor so far ???????GEN CHAN oh my ! shes younger than me but she flashed me 10 buggs willingly ! oh my i kept asking her "are u sure?????its like ACJC lehs" and gen being gen replied "yar its to help the methodist schs rite?,its ok !" whoa !!!!!!!!! mabey its the affinity she has with acjc just strike out the c and ull get her sch ajc ...hmmm mabey we are family acjc,cjc and ajc =)

smiling ......

hmm i dun say hi to ppl as much as b4 animore sometimes i hav no qualms abt passing them by without making any friendly gestures thou they may be 5 cm away .i say tt its training from one of my activity in sch haha .i find it appaling tt ppl can be "friends" at the activity but arnd the sch we are just strangers.hmmm which is nort exactly v.healthy for bonding rarrr ....its our last yr alr ,dunch be so liyke datt lehs hurmphhh! ok it shall start with me haha gonna be thick skinned.i cant stand fakeness no more!

2007-02-20T00:09:00.000-08:00

cny house visiting is an aboulute inefficient waste of time in this morden day and age ,but sacrifices hav to be made ,some things are just necessary. Just like changing out of ur dirty clothes everydae .Aint it quirky to get together with all ur cousins and gamble with melon seeds(everybody starts with 20 ,and tries hard nort to put them in ur mouths) and play foul ? All my cousins are younger than my bro and i ..My youngest cousin was supposed to deal me 140 monopoly cash but gave me 410 buggs instead ! haha see dun u like them young and innocent and cant count.*beams* i was laughing so hard i cldnt play anymore ,neither did i wanna cheat a little young kid who truly believes tt im deserving of the cash .

andrea is 6 and she plays maple story and shes at level 8 =) my bro was bewildered and exclaimed" even she can play maple story whalau im darn childish " so yeah this is the sad story of a pseudo barker boy who listens to chineese pop and wasted 2 yrs of his life wacking pigs and mushrooms in mapleland .Haha nevertheless is still think tt i hav a great bro .

tml ,well be back at sch again
time waits for no one
im gonna fix the cam
then we can take pics
rrrrrarrr can we be j1 again?=)

2006-12-11T05:09:00.000-08:00

ive been so so bz *rants even my weekends are filled

fri - wake up at 7 for track,shop with mum and ahyee,tuition ,cell grp till 11 plus at night
sat-morns with parents ,chem,maths ,church till 9.30
sun-church briefing ,econs tution till 6 then ecosolo

have camp the whole of next week ,lols im so dead

warghhh another mth of holidae ...tts all tt i need to finish all the homework =))) TIME SHALL WAIT FOR ME WONT U ???

actually i do things,and i mean everything v.v.slowley ............haha ahhhh yes no wonder

DEAR GOD PLS MULTIPLY MY TIME AND TT ILL USE IT WISELY

2006-12-01T05:53:00.000-08:00

The grass on the side of the track had better grow stronger and greener tsk haha it has just been enriched with yakult and essence of chicken mixed with lols god knows what .arghhh super unfit now aft 2 weeks of absence frm track ,,,,,,,haiz lets see i think i need 10 more trainings to get fitter and finish tt darn 6 times 200m and sprint tt last leg instead of totally losing all my energy and lying like jelly on anywhere clean .go go go !yeah there are more girl trackers now whoo!haha thou i dun realli know them thou .shengyang and gang are super fit haha still talking aft like how manys rounds whoa ! yes tts my aim to be talking and laughing even at the 6Th 200 m dash ! right now i can onli look up to them in awe .

i saw felicia! now wheres germs (the worm virus thing )???lols germs is weird hui zhen too they onli make noise on my friendster but they nv tagg here ~~oh yo where hav u all gone too darlinks ???

2006-11-28T08:21:00.000-08:00

ITS GREAT TO BE BACK!

om! we are back 2 daes earlier than expected cause we cldnt wait to get off phuket esp my bro who was suffering frm motion sickness all day long hes like pregnant or sumthing ...we were singing all the national dae songs tt we know all the way back =))) i wanted to take a pic of myself kissing the airplane seat goodbye .. but my mum thinks its disgusting hehheh so yeah so what we took are all the decent photos where u stand still like a pole =))

heres a few random thoughts abt phuket

1)damn ex! haha amazing huh u tot that thailand was a heaven for shopping ,the taxi fares are like 50-100 sing dollars out of the resort ...tts like one big kiss for sinagpore taxi fares

2) some of the thai ppl mislead us,they claimed to be giving us instruction when we got down the hotel van . they brought us to weird places and charged us for it .

3)unfortunetly theres hardly any real thai food there ,its all fusion food ,phuket is a hot tourist destination for the westerners so they have to cater to the needs of the majority of the tourists,ive tried 4 bowls of tom yum goog there and they all taste different ...go figure!

4) my bro reminded me tt everything in phuket town is fake =) tt was a rather random though frm my bro but its true aft i thought for a while.... there are real imitation goods and real transvistites ...but heyy tt was really an eye opener=)) buttts there are real fruits ,and the fruits are really good esp the longans they make a crisp sound when u press them oooohhhh yeah

5) the resort we stayed in is wonderful =)) theres someone to make ur bed and line it with fresh linens,theres cable tv and a nice beach to lie on (the sae water quality is only slightly better than s'pore thou )and the toilet is love ...it smells so good

6)im so glad tt we can drink the water frm the tap in s'pore ..in thailand we hav to drink bottled water ...so yea we are armed with the 1.5 liter water bottle everywhere we went ....but it was quite an experience tt i enjoyed hehheh i hav a bottle of singha chlorinated water sitting on my table now to remind myself of what i have in s'pore .the water really does hav a strong smell of bleach and it taste sweet

7) my father was on a seminar our family had dinner with the other ppl on seminar
frm asia ,ive learnt quite a bit frm them ...there was this malaysian uncle who made us laugh loads ill definetly rem him if theres another seminar like this

8) our parents exposed my bro and i to white water rafting....its so surreal ,its rather dangerous too as there were many huge rocks tt we cld crash into but it was the best experience ever .we also did elephant trekking ,i found it darn cruel for humans to be riding on animals ,i tot i saw the elephat tear ,they use a shap tool to poke the elephant to stop it frm moving .....yikes it was like the longest elephant ride ever..lols my father tried to give it some relief by massaging it .we also tried sitting on a water bufflo cart ,my father reminded us abt being equally yolked he pointed out to us tt if one bufflo is lazy the other will suffer and hav to work harder .we also rode on a AVm(ithink) its like a car a mini one without a shelter over ur head so we speed around the plantation hehheh my daddy says i can speed(=tt was thrilling ...lols but i just cant stand one and a half hrs getting frm one activity to another haha my bro was puking loads up and around the hilly moutains

in all it was a good experience but the cost of living is too high ..i wonder how the local ppl survive ,we talked to the bus driver and a few other thais tt we encountered ,they dun save much and most of them dun hav jobs during the dry season (april to oct )everybody stays at home because the weather is too hot and the trees die ..to make things worse the wells are dry too so they hav to purchase bottled water for drinking,bathing,cooking and blahs .treated water is nort chaep and they earn so little ...yikes! i seriously wonder how they live .....

anywaes home sweet home

2006-11-24T06:46:00.000-08:00

ill be gone for a holi frm tml on wards till i dunnoe when =))) thk god hah tt signals tt my mum is fit for flying so im a eager beaver .

wont be arnd for class chalet thou but i pray tt god will be with us in this bond of love , a time to renew the friendships and to protect everyone whos going for the chalet =)) 1sb6 u gals and guys rock

i feel realli refreashed aft reading Psalm 42 .I havent been really god centered all these while .slowley he was just slipping out of my life i nv cried out to him anymore and stuff i cld be enjoying myself with my friends but i feel empty .like todae i actually badmouthed a friend to someone in tution ,HA i feel really sore now i mean I HAVE NORT LOVED i hardly see the good in ppl anymore im no longer joyful bleahs' .Dear lord i see my wrong hav u heard the verse????"who ever does not love does not know god because god is love" cant rem where its taken frm haha

heres the verse tt spoke to my heart just when i needed it

As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?

3 My tears have been my food
day and night,
while men say to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"

4 These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving
among the festive throng.

5 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and 6 my God.
My [c] soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.

7 Deep calls to deep
in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
have swept over me.

8 By day the LORD directs his love,
at night his song is with me—
a prayer to the God of my life.

9 I say to God my Rock,
"Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
oppressed by the enemy?"

10 My bones suffer mortal agony
as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"

11 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

and a song to end it all

As The Deer

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

(Chorus)
You alone are my strength,my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

You're my friend and You are my brother
Even though You are a king
I love You more than any other
So much more than anything

Chorus
I want You more than gold or silver
Only You can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye

Chorus

2006-11-20T23:22:00.000-08:00

.I saw Melcher twice todae at ....kovan haha.Like ??? how often do u see someone frm acjc (which is like more than 10 mrt stops away frm sch?) .my mum took my bro and i to the clinic near srjc =) when we came out of the docs office ,i realised tt he has been sitting directly behind us all the while while my bro and i were talking ! haha sneaky sneaky huh.We saw him again later in the day at heart land mall with his mum ,this time he waved =) lols sneaky no more.

btw are fbts obsecne??? my mum thinks it looks like a giant underwear lols ...om i bet she thinks im a flasher .YELPS=/

my muscles were tired frm training yest tt it made quite a huge protest ...yes man i was kinda shocked when my muscles started moving up and down by itself o.O it was quite an experience..i didnt know muscles were so much alive .lols i wldnt hav recovered so fast if jiao lian didnt come to my rescue ^_^ . was running then next ting i knew i was sprawling in pain on the ground ...lols my capt did warn me jokingly "later ar u run then u warghhh then crumble on the track".tt sounded rather ridiculous at first until it really happened .To me its still a weird phenomenon

2006-11-19T05:45:00.000-08:00

the heart is willing but the flesh is weak
haha tt aptly describes the relationship
btw me and my homework now
the scripts wont write itself
its easier to dream
haha
since shengyang and weijoe have been talking
abt their study plans
we shld study tgh man
tt wld fasten me to the chair
and stay awake for more than 5 mins
alrighhts tts crazy plan number one
hopefully ,i wont turn back on my words

the holidaes doesnt seem to feel the same
as when we were pri and sec sch
do we think more deeply as we grow older ?
i guess that the many events that have taken place this year
have somehow shook my world
life is getting too complicated
for this simpletons mind
mabey tts why we like cartoons and we brag abt them
mind u tts when we are in jc
17 yr olds carrying spongebob pencilcases*ahem ,pikachu ???
rem in pri sch ?haha how we braged about
reading books without colours and pictures
and all the reality tv shows we watched
how we wanted to grow up quickly
like mainly to grow taller=)
and fit into the adults world
to get the cookie jar of that shelf BY OURSELVES
we just wanted to be super kids in our huge and limitless
world

right now ,i kinda wish tt my mum would make the decisions for me
i miss the feeling of my parents
watching over me =) and guiding me
no wonder they say that our parents know best

transitions
its a scary thing
like many of the jc students out there
we have been displaced so many times this yr
leave our sec schools ,pae og ,pae class,
jae(change sch) ,jae og ,jae class
too many touch and go relationships
its tiring to think abt it
i wonder how true ive been to others
cause honestly i dun rem much abt the past
it seems tt many of us have changed
even if i rem
the memories dun quite fit the face
we seem like strangers
it just leads me to think
we can have many friends
but how many of them would remain true ?
or to how many ive been a true friend to?
haha but we will just continue to move on
lols do we have a choice???
i feel cruel
buts im glad tt i still keep in touch with
the special few but good friends frm sec sch=))
i dun know how long we will last
god provides
for he gives and take away
since every good thing come from god
i wont think so much either =)
thks to you YOU YOU YOU you and you (haha i can onli think of 6 special ppl frm sch sch )
god u rock
cause in u my worries look so small and insignificant =)

2006-11-17T04:55:00.000-08:00

warghh! haha just rcved a letter frm angel tt our cell grp may hav the opportunity to go carolling at dey zoo?maharajah! the zoo! our cell grp wanted an outing there since like last yr or sumthing this is like some 2 in one blessing of some sort =)

heres an excerpt of the letter "there is a Christmas carolling session which we are organising ourselves to.... the ZOO! how about, singing to the animals and blessing the tourists that come alone, warming the hearts of lonely zookeepers? haha. :) "

*grinzzzzz*oh yeah ! is it gonna be like an all girls choir,since our cell consist of onli girls ...lols its gonna feell like PLagain ...PLMGSS the singing sch .REm the prefects trip to m'sia the last time???we sang frm s'pore all the way to jorhor ,much to the dismay of the yuying student leaders HA.to add on to their agony we sang a non stop ballad frm the "great i am" musical all the way back =)))))))))tt has been part of my fondest memories @PL +))))))PL IS LOVE ~comeon ac lets sing ,thou its a christian institution haha the ppl dun sing tt much haiz butts nvm its because PL-LITES are a special bunch of ppl .ive had like 3 diff song books in all frm pl.one frm pri sch ,then sec sch ,then in upper sec when they reprinted the old old pl song book(the a few pages paper bk=)heh heh tell me pl is special .

heh todae was was ablast considering the fact tt ive been rotting and trying to do phy thw whole week .i tried subway for the v.first time with vall heh and we saw wenlong and his gf at raffles place ,nort bad huh we had a nice lunchand were star gazing .met sing and jo fo the world vision briefing =) jo had a crazy idea to walk frm tangong pargar to city hall heh quite thrilling ,we walked past dey merlion ,the esplanade ,saw loads of colourful balls ,water fountains by the roads ,window shopping ,view some art pieces on display =) we cld hav taken loads of photos if we had a cam . saw bize too at neptune theater ...bize oh bize why did u quit =/

2006-11-14T06:28:00.000-08:00

heyyheyy =))

im supposed to be at the ex-exco meeting with claud,mel,jas,rach.yizhen,chuuny!!!,and zongs

and i was also supposed to meet up with jerms and huizhen this morn aft jerms had her lessons at sch =) i didnt even call huizhen in the end

haha i cant move much todae cause ma jiao lian's training was kinda streneous with tt big heavy medicine ball. she gave yimei and i the small ball in the end buttts too late cause im having muscle pull now...ill go for the next training which is like ..in less than 10 hrs??? if i can walk down the stairs ^_^ r the rest walking like crabs too???

nevertheless we shld feel empowered aft the training... 3km seh !

i must seriously start sitting down to study ...i bet everyone else is trying to physco themselves to do so ...its like the holis and the house is so comfy ,as u grow older the books u read fades to the monotonous black and white =/ u pick up a text book and u feel like zZZZZZ =) butts ill conquer all tt ...go mings and all the rest who realli wanna study !

u noe god has reminded me of his promises when my jrs like nic and gen tell me how good god has been there for them throughout the Os just like he did for me during my os

nic was rejoycing tt god pointed out to her all the mistakes she had made and when she went back to the qns they were indeed wrong! amazing

lols gen said tt god was good to her too butts she didnt elaborate =)i shall ask her next sat =))

GO jRS !in his and mine

2006-11-12T06:02:00.000-08:00

HEYYS PPL CONTINUE TO PRAY FOR MY MUMMY ,for her fever to stop fluctuating and tt the doctors will know how to treat her and against any other complications ,the cause is not known yet ,mabey by tues .thks eugene,sharon,nic,gen,val,jo,joanna,miss gloria,chan , for keeping her in prayer and the many others out there we really appreciate it =)

aniwaes,ive coined a name for my bro ,the "one day in advance man" yes he doesnt study 2 days before but 1 day before any exams big or small ...i think its too late to learn frm his mistakes haha he and his friends hav been destressing by screaming at each other over the phone ...lols yes imagine two sixteen yr old boys screaming tgh letting out shrieks and screams and pouring out their grieviences to each other ahhhh male BONDING =)
and my bro keeps usinghis lousy reverse phycology tatic on me "If u duunnoe how to do this and this u do not deserve to take the a levels " haha hmm the things tt bros do when they are desperate ....buts YEAhness cause i managed to slove almost all of his qns =)

i was just having some random thoughts
1) if we are taking non-fat everything now then when our methabolic rate decreases in the future what are we gonna eat?

2) how can recarnation be true when the world pop keeps increasing ...?????GO figure !

2006-11-06T08:54:00.000-08:00

heyys peeps =))
it wassnt sunny todae
the rain was pelting down hard on me
my mummy
i just keep hearing her screaming my name
those shouts of horror
sends me trembling
what happened mommy?
what happened
why can we get back to last week
when we were happy and cheery
those screams sound so foreign
mommy dun scream
i see the bridge lengthening btw u and me
i cant reach u nor can i see your familliar face
my visions blurring
my eyes covered in tears
mommy i just dun want, no tears
i see the emotional blackmails ,it makes me angry mum
lets just keep aunty outta the pic
and restart our lives
im tired
so tired of explaining tt i dun follow in her shoes
im ur daughter ,i follow u
believe me mum
what i sae is true
why dun we start anew?

i felt like my mums punching bag like twice the whole dae (yes i am angry,sad tt everything has gone wrong)...how i wish she hadnt had such a bad relationship with tt aunty ,now everything i do seems to mirror the aunties image ,i probably remind her of the aunty ....yikes i hate tt ...I WANT MY MOMMY BACK!MOMMY >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

do u hear my cries?
do u see my pain
my heart is wrenching
someone ease the pain
all the beautiful memories
suddenly erased
like a dream
only but a fantasy
i want my old mommy back
i pray tt we will be peaceloving again
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhrhggggggggggghh

2006-10-31T06:46:00.000-08:00

ive been rather emo for the last hr cause ive been reading my friends emo blogs even their msn nicks aint tt cherry either .. time to beat all tt emo blues by chomping on chocos =)))...yummy .. mabey we all just need to get out ,just to hang loose with each other ,go wack tennis balls just like we did aft Os ^_^,and make cards and write letters to each other like we did when we were in sec sch (i rem ariel and i writing letters to each other even thou we were in the same class and saw each other every dae =))),i love being in an all girls sch )i still have the whole box of letters in my room =)i miss doing all tt stuff ...omg ! im starting to feel emo too haha ...feelin all tingly inside

alrittes lets stop looking back ,lets create the future

i shall wack tennis balls with the babes (vall,jerms,sammi,jacko)
make cards(jacko ying )
write letters (to ...hmmm )
go carolling (with my cell grp members)
world vision thing (with sing )
meet up with atens epsilon and 1so9(lookin forward )
church camp=))) my first!
go n holi ...amazing thailand
and class outing (lets hav new yr and christmas celebrations tgh ....muahaha)

rittes now im still stuck with my dates with chi ...2 more agonising daze ...i need to glue myself to the chair to force myself to read !go ppl ...go chi ! GONE FOREVER

2006-10-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

everybody looked happy and relaxed todae ...wells its the "happy last day of school dae " like what nathaniel calls it haha ,i like tt fellow class rep,the kind who slaps u in the back and go "BOO!" !i was in a happy mood and walking arnd with sing ning aft sch like chi As dun exist =)) wells wont tt be heavenly*dreams *heyys did u realise tt there are CLEAR skyes todae =_) I LIKE ,our world doesnt seem so grey any more

oh my i nv thought tt last dae of sch wld be tt chiong
.I was running together with the rest of the strangers in sch sch like a mad woman(the kind of life i lead EVEYDAE at PL running arnd with chunny,kinda like tt actually =))) ,but once u get the momentum of walking realli fast ,u feel like u can fly ....alrighttts im so ready to train for track ! go MINGXIU!

btw ..i think i realli love my class haha ,and i still treasure ppl like michael lai thou i think he wont finish Our last pasrt of the PW slides by todae =/ ....thks ppl for the won-derrrful year =))u ppl rox rwaks rock stone haha

i like the sound of the harp ,i used to watch jill(my buddy =) play the harp while i was at pl ...ahhhhh harp ...if music be the food of love...play on ..haha

2006-10-25T03:29:00.000-07:00

hmmm ive been rather judgemental recently ...tts bad .i may have hurt others in the process either knowingly or unknowingly ,either ways its just bad .oh lord i see my wrong =/// guide me and lead me .Over these few days ive been living a life as if god doesnt exist.Im sorry if ive hurt anyone .

ive been rather judgemental towards the opposite sex haha weird but true ,ill admit .ive been irritated by my bro so much these few days tt i feel like kicking him haha heres what he did ( ive shared this with my pw grp=))))

1 )my bro aint such a darling when he force his ghost stories on me ahhhhhh! haha there i was trying to sing while cupping my ears so tt i wont hear his stories buttttttttts it totally didnt work ,i *gulps * heard it .i woke up in the middle of the night finding myself crying and scared and so angry ,at tt point i realli wanna go to my bros room to kick him ...buttttts god said no ! oh my but i was dying to

2)hes chauvinistic .....*cries* whats with guys and their ego????? i was walking down the stairs and then he has to block me ,i was given two choice either to walk under his arms or to walk towards the right ( ive nv played such a dumdedmum game). this was quite funny but i dun realli understand the rationale behind it .buttts since i had time to spare so i played along with him ....haha so i just slept on the stairs to see how long he can stand and block me ,he played cheat larz while my mum slepped away he told me ANOTHER GHOST STORY ! okies he won

i think tt this episode has made me stay clear of being nice to the guys ,i find myself refuting what they say and trying to thump them down ...haha tts so sad .its just the emotional scars ,i dun understand why he wld hurt me like tt,trying to scare me when he knows im weak to such stuff.

butttts seriously give me more time okies ,i can still feel the anger in me ...if im weird just let me be ,im still trying .tyring to be nice trying to open up .i hope ull see my efforts =))))pray for me , i need lotsa help

2006-10-23T18:32:00.000-07:00

GIRLS rule boys drool ,pigs stinks and vegetable rots .... whooo! let me be a feminist for a day =)))))

happy holis people ....the day tt ive been waiting for so long a day where u can sleep in like a pig and snore frm dawn to dusk*beams *

i realli hope tt there wont be any subtraction to the number of classmates i have in class ....i wanna mark EVERYBODIES attandence everymorning and smile at the familiar faces which has contributed to Our happiness as a class .....this class is not just any class it is ........ 1SB6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*plays superman returns to create atmosphere *

we started out as strangers(cliche=)) ,unaware and uncertain about our future, i nv though i could give my trust and myself to the people who stick like a sis or a bro , u all came along walked in and walked BESIDE and alongside me (esp the girls ) awwwwwwwwww haha...i nv thought i would be able to communicate with the china men and wooomen frm river valley(like more than 8 of them...whOO) ...haha they are actually a funky and spunky lot...they make a helll lot of NOISE haha but whats life without the shoutings to KIck start ur dae huh hon =)) .im so glad tt god has changed my perspective so much...u noe do not judge a book by its cover because u havent seen the contents inside =)))i tot AC girls were bimbotic .....until i met CUIWEN ..yip she has brains,ive always thought that yuxiang was murderous (flinging sissors up in the air and setting battries on fire )...and up till todae my stand hasent changed .qianzhi looks super skinny and blur(like she needs alort of help haha) but give her a ball and the bball court becomes her stage ,shes so pro she plays like one of the guys plus her blurness has brought us lotsa laugher ..theyys this will be a long list my hands are crying out alr haha wells so long as u know tt u are special can alr =))) somethings words just cant describe a person ....okies im realli tired GO HALLUCINATE WHAT ULL THINK I MIGHT WRITE

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

2006-10-19T05:38:00.000-07:00

oh mY i hope i advance or promote *clatter *
miss too refused to indulge )_= OMG !
haidar told me tt sr is releasing their results next wed ,haha boo! must wait so long ...buts as promised ! SRJC OG and class outing aft chi As =))))))haha liyi finally got her wish .

alriteees im realli nort in the mood now ....brrrrrr

2006-10-14T09:05:00.000-07:00

I was exploring my own sch with these grp of ppl todae at the acjc open house
1st grp-althea and a pl girl
2nd-darsh,jeanne,charlotte and 2 other pl lites
3rd-the 7 pl lites with the guy who rem me as their prefect=)))
4th-chloe and vanessa frm pl track(=
5th -frm acs barker martin soo with 4 others
6th -also frm acs barker kenneth !

butttts!ahah my job is made easier because ....we all know each other ....so my duty was a piece of cake maharajah!plus I was v.comforted to see some of the ppl whom hav walked with me through my days at pl.

trixia yong ,my senior frm pl in rjc now was taking her sats in my sch todae warghh! lols pl reunion in ac ,her presence totally made my dae

rach frm mgs and nicole mao frm pl tried to call me but i had left alr ,im so sry but i hope u all had fun at the open house .Ashley wanted me to take her arnd buttttttts i had been assigned to a diff grp of ppl ...so sry !i cldnt choose

had bonding and worked together with the other class reps like katherine ,bize,Nathaniel,richie and wei jian =))) thks for helping me out plus thks for making me laugh with all ur crazy antics

I was drained aft the tour so I litified with the rest of the trackers behind the booth and occasionally hoping over to CF to serenade with them and give out cookies .

I feel like a superhero girl*grinz

Rushed off frm sch to meet jerms and huizhen for maths ….huizhen nv fails to make me her scapegoat! only the dumdedumb ppl wld fall for the same trick twice huh!jerms has upgraded frm leopard hairbands to lepard earings and polka dot hairband with a bow, shell prolly create another wave in NY .it sounds like an odd combination but it actually looks good larz better than the lepard hairband many time =))

Left halfway for tuition for PLMGS founders day dinner with half the exco,shuyan,pastor Yolanda ,Melissa and their cell grp leader ,whoops I forgot miss koks name(and she was sitted beside me …oh no haha) ,and she attempted to make me feel guilty by listing out all the filial ppl who greeted her ,all her efforts to make me feel bad worked wonders ,alrittes next time I shall go up to her ,slap her back and go HEY! Since we all rem each other tt way haha miss kok rwaks ,I nv tot tt I wld communicate with her as a friend =)

Mrs tan lee huang frm pl primary rems me ! haha she knows me by my full name ….ooooooh haha so touched. without her I wldnt hav made it to the express stream .she rem my class as being the most notorious class =))) wells continue to rem us tt way ….haha I wonder how I turn out to be like quite guai since yuen mei was my neighbour,my classmate and my best friend @pri sch ,she was like the most notorious person in the whole sch …buts I still think tt yuenmei rwaks =)))and ironically I think tt she is a blessing frm god

Lao shi!!! Haha laoshi.as usual ,she conversed in chi while I spoke back in eng =)) haha how I wish she wld hit me on the head like she did before to make me speak =))))

2006-10-06T09:24:00.000-07:00

lols heyys peeeps its been a long time

haha ...wellls i cldnt contain my excitement when fabiola spoke the words of gold "end of ur exams "whaha lols frm the back of the hall ,i withnessed this spectacular sight of ppl shooting up frm their seats like little jack in a box,one guy tried to jump over a chair but triped over haha ...lols im so mean but yeah u get my drift .
PRAISE the LOrD cause i can finally sleep in peace...ahhhh yes peace

the end of promos signals the start of breaking loose *grinzzz
illl like to think tt i led a balanced life todae=))))there was time for studies with cui wen ,san,joanne,elgin.time with god tgh with the cf ppl at CF .And the reunion of ties with my classmates from PL =))) AMAZING.

u noe its been so hazy ...its so bad i cant see the face of anybody 50 m away from me like todae i only saw lited up laterns but not the person holding the lanterns ...kinda freaked me out abit when i was walking towards the garden to meet up with mich ,meixin ,jialing and jas .it was darn fun ,so glad i went in the end cause i was v.reluctant to stay out at night in the haze ..in the end i stayed meixian and jialing till nearlly 12 =)) OMG ! the lanterns and candels we lited are so preety ! we were despretly trying to find the moon and the stars haha but to no avil,what an unromantic setting ! so we layed on the ground and drew the stars and the moon with our sparklers =))))it was breathtaking ...we were buring so much stuff ,i think we contributed to the haze too...the air smells like bbq-ed air aniwaes ^_^thks mich for calling me out tonight i really appreciate the time spent with u guys =))my friends are HOT haha just look at the no. of guys who asked them for their nos lols it happens all the time when im out with my classmates but too bad for the guys ,they are not as desprate as they ar haha ...i think such stuff is just part and parcel of growing up

haha nort alort of ppl know the existance of this blog but just in case u see ur name here ill just like to thk u for being a part in my life thru this exam period

jermaine ,huizhen -for accompanying me for math tution and helping me distress by hanging arnd heartland
clarence -for ur econs notes =)))
cuiwen,paul,clovis-for being my study buddies,ive learnt so much frm all of u
angel,sharon,nicole,gen,ashely and rach -thks for ur prayers =)))and being such great jrs =)))
JOANNA ! -haha ,u always make me laugh all the time ,continue to shine with the heart of love of god
wanling ,candy ,jeslyn,kelvin-its amazing now we hit off so well with each other considering the fact tt ive only had 3 lessons with u guys =)))
LYDIA -lols how can i forget u ,im so blessed by u and ur mum for being so gracious to david and i uve sent us home like throughout the whole exam period ...we are sooooo sooo blessed
lizhen -thks for ur msg of encouragement i hope ur head is feelin better now =)))

i can nv thk u guys enuff but i pray tt god will bless u all (+

2006-09-25T07:35:00.000-07:00

i need u here with me lord ,
i just cant find the answer
hear our cry,
see our pain
hear our prayer ,
once again ,
i realli need u lord,

i used to think ull always be there
i used to think ull come for us someday
for its been so long since uve been gone
theres nothing i can hold on

r u there lord
do u care
can u answer my prayer
abba father
can u hear me
tell me how to believe
cause why does it seem
that its just an empty dream
cause i need to know if ur still here
for me

dear lord i feel so lost at times ,i wonder why i react the way i do sometimes haha theres like this conflict inside of me .but i want to do what i shld at diff situations ...mabey im just tired...sometimes i wonder if im nice seasonally ...i dun know but i just hope tt my mood gets better aft promos !!!!!!!! ahhhhhh counting down to END of promos !

2006-09-08T07:26:00.000-07:00

dun u feel like screaming ???? ahha yes tts the activity i wanna indulge in on mon .get the girls frm my class to scream with me .another nagging thing ill like to do is to run and run and run until i take flight off the cliff at the end of the world and soar with the birds of the skies (thou realli ill just fall and die:/ )
ahhhhhhhh promos is driving me to insanity .ahhhhhhhhh must do some hokous pokus and come up with some magic in 20 days......ahhhhhhh rants rants rants

btw i was just thinking of the people in my life ....it looks like the number of ppl tt i know in acjc is v.little compared to PL .that lead me to think of the number of ppl i can turn to ,the ppl i can just call and crap to at any time of the day ....i thought of 9=)))) ahhhh yes such relief and i wanna thk god for them .

dont u think tt ull get to know someone better by working with them ? lols just some random thoughts

ahhhhhhhh yes jermaine and hui zhen are in cahoots tgh
i was so diligently doing maths till they came to doodle on my paper !
haha i still hav tt piece of paper ,i shall frame it up tpo show the world how think -skinned they can be ...MUAHAHAHAH i can be evil too

jermaine was deciding over what to eat for breakfast so she asked us for our opinions(seriously she always pick the opposite harx !she has this element of unpredictibility in her...i dun even know why we bothered to ans hah )

me;fruits
jerms ;huhhhhhhh just tt?
jerms :like what ?rambutan again huh
huizhen;mingxiu!*laughs like a hyena*
jerms;buy one big bag then walk and eat on the road
me ;-_- ...lols

anywaes muahahahaha !!!!!!!!!!nort bad .....they learn realli fast

okies i need to wake up realli early tml ! uncle tony and adrian waited for me like for eternity todae !*gasp * *trys to act guilty *
whos daryl and ivan ?????? adrian has been asking me abt these ppl ...seriously I DUn know haha i prolly know ONLI abt 1 percent of the ppl in my sch.our schs huge !!!!!!! its like frm where our class is sitted i can only see this whole multitude of acsians (like 100m)at the back ....its nort like in sr where u noe half the ppl in the sch in 5 days

haha talking abt huge .....are we just a number? so insignificant amongst so many ppl .i wld hav thought so if i hadnt had god .inoe tt im special in his eyes =))))god rwaks !hippie and a hooooRAYYY

2006-09-04T08:52:00.000-07:00

bing ,bang ,pong ,piang
one electron flys by
a bouncy ball loses energy and loses height
triangles ,inequality , sums aplenty fly like crazy
lets just add the law of demand and slupply to the list of study

these are the topics for the qns with no ans tt are stuck in my mind
oh lord it seems tt my studies realli aint so fine
ahhhhh theres a traffic congestion in my brain that u can find

why is it tt everything seems to collide
phy chem maths and oh dear econs
they all seem to be in cahoots with the manly calculator
it is a con to be ineffectual in understanding complex equations
as its the rate determining step to getting ur answers

haha! ,what a lousy and nonsensical poem ,but wellllls just a little attempt

btw ,im quite shocked ......
i just saw steve irwin lively and jumping arnd the reptiles a few days ago on kids central and now.......
hes officially dead and still in his grave .....
the unpredictibility of life is gound shaking
silence has nv been so deafening
it screams

clarence is obviously a steve irwin fan this was how our convo went

mingxiu*traffic congestion in my brain o.O says:
yar i saw him jumping abt on tv nort too long ago
mingxiu*traffic congestion in my brain o.O says:
and now hes in the grave!
]!cLaRbeaR![ i salute you says:
...
]!cLaRbeaR![ i salute you says:
stupid stingray
]!cLaRbeaR![ i salute you says:
im going to eat lots of stingray for every bBq
!cLaRbeaR![ i salute you says:
protect the crocodiles! eat the stingrays!

yummy ! tt can onli be gd news for singning and joanne =))
protect the crocodiles!eat the stingrays!stingray lovers unite and boogie tgh =))))

2006-09-01T08:32:00.000-07:00

It is the start of our well deserved "holiday "shld I smile??? like what cui has said we shall indulge in our mugger camp, mugger lunch and mugger sleepovers tgh =))) now, tt doesn't sound too bad huh =))))? My heart tells me i have to study but my brain tells my hand tt its tired...my body is arguing with each other...oh no its going quite mad ...do u hav tt feelin too..hurr hurrs 29 more days to promos ...all the best too all the poor souls out there *screams*dear lord, I pray tt u'll be the force that guides our hand as we write, the guardian over all our thoughts =)))

today was coool ...teachers day concert @ACJC broke the monotony of the repetitive cycle of us having to go to sch to scramble thru long overdue work ,trying our best to stay awake hah I shant go on further ,it makes my head spin...I bet u are all cross-eyed now XD .In ACJC celebrations makes u high ,when we have fun we go crazy tgh .i had great company today =))).AC girls and boys can really sing ,talent abounds from every nook and cranny of the school .our hair stood up during the ogl and choir item ,there was this tingling sensation all over ha-ha and our hearts melted, it was like this whole emotional rollercoaster ride .whoooowhee .David's item didn't fail us ,it actually sounded as good as when he sang it to the privileged us( Lydia and I) after MUTS (movie under the stars ) last week ,we are so lucky ,go seranGOONers !shujia just makes our jaws drop, did u check out those grooves ? =)))

maharajah! I was out with cui and I saw jack and ying on the way at doby ghaut =))) every time I see ying I think of how she pinch our ikan billis every mon when we were at PLMGSS ,yes OUR she was tt hungry haha …and hav I told u ? Jacko accidentally gave her first kiss on the cheeks to me when we were in sec 2, I rem it to be wet and sloppery o.O, haha she must have been drooling then and I just happened to be tt convenient tissue paper to soak up all her saliva!

NEVERTHELESS ,GURL U ROCK MY LIFE!!

2006-08-26T08:41:00.000-07:00

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ! yeash im so far behind even with tution ,just look at my chem tutor finnally crawled to the chapter on chemical kinetics ! gasp gasp gasp ! lols everybody was complaining todae ,u shld hav seen how long-faced and stressed up mr tony looked .diff colleges are doing diff stuff ,we hav ajc,rjc,nyjc,srjc,njc,acjc students in my class lols lovely he hasnt covered electro chem ,chemical equilibrium ,entropy ,organice chem yet .HOLY ! 5 more weeks left and everybody is pouring on him.haiz but who will take pity on us when we dont become j2s next yr rittes ?

jo and jermaine have quit chem tution alr ....ahhhhhhhh,but ill see them arnd so its ok .just made new friends with another ny girl =))))) god provides .talking aby jermaine ,shes spending the night in a sleeping bag with her pw mates at changi airport again !whoa .i seriously wonder how tt is possible ,where do they lay to rest anywae?????i mean u cant just claim ur ground on any empty or vacant spots ritesss

is anybody stressing out alr ? 35 more days aint exactly a long time .so much to do in so little time .i wonder how some ppl cope realli .just take my classmates for eg . so many of them are actively involved in their ccas, i see,cuiwen, clovis and michael.y running round the sch ,being bz with their ccas like even now during the pre -exam preparation period.does being bz make u more discliplined? cause i rem it helping me alort .i was juggling with loads of commitment in the past ,track at least 3 times a week,prefect meetings,debrief everydae.first aid monitress,planning progs for the sch ,cheographing at least 1 dance a yr for the board ,ballet ,tution galore .i sent out almost 25 sms-es a day .now i hardly send out 5 sometimes .no body calls to ask me to solve any problems now,if there are any ,its nothing too big .and i hav to admit ,all tt bz-ness killed alort of precious time tt i cld hav spent on building relationships .it turned me into a workaholic =)))) i was on high when i had so many problems to settle ,and i found them to be challenging ,actually it felt good when the jrs come to u with their problems ,it made me feel important,i had 15 jrs to take care of everyterm (: .haha.the low came when i found tt i wasnt doing much aft handover and stuff ,so i had to fill the gap by studying frm morning to night with my classmates =))).it was then tt i discovered tt it was what i was doing ,and how ppl were satisfied with me tt was the measure of my own self- worth .lols how sad huh ? wells i didnt think tt it was a bad thing at least ive learnt alort more about myself and have worked with diff ppl of diff working styles ,it was the experience tt mattered .

ive lived the life tt i always wanted ,right now im happy with he life i hav now ,a preety laidback one actually =)))) but wells nort for long as much as i wld like it to be acually .come sept ill be devoting myself to track track and more TRACK,i just hope tt the climate in track wld change.....wells hmmm im waiting for change???ill just be litifying huh???wellss it looks like i need to do something abt it with the help of god of course=))) hopefully it wld be like in the past, a passion with a purpose for track

over the last mths ive proveen myself tt my worth doesnt lie in how much work i do or what my enemies think of me =))) my identity is in christ !i dun hav to please men ,ill nv find eternal glory there .so long as try to keep my walk with god right ,he will provide ,if he puts me to it he will put me THROUGH IT =))) everybody say AHMEN ! lols
...our god is great(:

2006-08-19T08:46:00.000-07:00

my bro is laughing on the couch watching some late night chinese comedy with his sisters mom =)))...ill gladly trade places with him ....sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ill gladly do my eom if it cld make me laugh or smile .Im embarking on my THIRD eom now .The enthusiasm to do my eom ,if there was any to begin with is slowly fading away ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh rants RANTS!!!!!!!!! aye ! ur typical teenage angst .let the creative juices flow *twang hopefully aft reading our grps eom and wr MR lee tean hoe wld jump of his seat and rock to the beat hurrrrrrsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss .

i managed to catch up with chunny this week !the one and onli chunnywho is now in vjc . she was one of the fellow prefect who i grew up with in the prefectorial board ...yes grew...the place we were watered ,pruned and cut(ouch ,OUCH ,YELPS),it was there where we also bore fruits( i hope tt we had left our legacy .....haha im egoist (learnt tt frm cui'n ) .i cld ramble on abt this forever .i still rememer the days we ran arnd the sch dodging frm tanchuns tabletennis coach (o her coach training comes before duties) taking shortcuts through tt mini and narrow stretch of deserted garden when we were still at lorong ah so...ahhhhhhh yes such things ill nv forget ...see it has such a neighbourhoody feel and name to itit was hot hot hot ! wearing the banana tie with 3 layers underneath running up and down 4 levels to carry out all the admin work
,thks tanchun for all tt beautiful memories and i realli enjoyed being in analogics with u when we were under cheryl=))),u are prolly the only person who walks as fast ,if nort faster than me in sch ,so theres always some one there to hav those friendly compeition with =))))our days in pl always ended arnd 7 pm and u always seemed to be arnd somehow+)))))

her mum is a member of the PSSg so the exco sees her arnd .her mum has a tution center near my hus so we when we hang out ull always see us at the tauhui stall where we brought our buddies jeanne,renee,jill,peixuan,dede and tanchun youngest buddy during our combined buddy gathering =)))) see we are spreading our tradition =)))

whao theres alort more things tt we did tgh ...like paint the banner ,pb bbq ,etc...dadadadadad 4 yrs ....with something new everyday . also learnt alort from u on how to be a better person .THANKS .im sure god had placed u in my life for a reason and i wanna thank god for tan chun ^_^ aka chunny!i pray tt ull continue to be a blessing to those arnd you .

some photos to relive the memories

r sch is the place we love best ! our sch is above all the rest
heres tan chun the brainiac -she studies so hard tt the cover page has fallen off o.O
the toilets @ pl is so beautiful ...look at the murals behind us we! the privillaged bunch -we hav a rm to ourselves !

hehheh us with our jrs -presenting to u the pl bbq comm 2005-lols the few naughty jrs who disfigured us in the rest of the other neo prints (notice tt this doesnt hav any deco =)))))

2006-08-14T07:44:00.000-07:00

gods love ...it refreashes .todae was the first time since the beginning of the yr that god had touched my heart again !(the last was prolly last yr arnd december ) david and lizhen were leading worship with the CF people todae =))) but i just wanna tell them and their team tt worship was really good for me today,im sure that it has impacted the other ACSians too.

i was reminded of gods love for me ,in my mind i was just looking back on the way god had been with me throughout my life ...yes MY LIFE frm the dae tt i was crafted in my mothers womb ...we were never an accident ...god has a purpose for each and everyone of us =)))it was so real ...everything tt he had done . uncontrollably,the tears just streamed down my cheeks ,my non -christian friends were prolly wondering what an odd ball i was at chapel !=))) but hey ppl those were not tears of sorrows .it was tears of joy ,it is only in him that u can trade ur sorrows for joy ,the joy of the lord =)

this was the song tt spoke to the depths of my soul .njoy =)

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours
I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

2006-08-12T10:16:00.000-07:00

The o level chi results were out on fri.....glad tt most of them were filled with joy .Genevive did better than she expected !great job gal .nort sure of nic was happy with her results as ill only see her tml .heyys ashhh ! haha this was what she did when she gort back her results =)

lols my fellow cell grp member.wells god bless ur vocabulary and we'll support u if u choose to retake for chi .

My bro was confident tt he'll do really well but he didnt wells the onli consolation he gets is tt he got a distinction for his chi os ....how can i nort be proud of him heh =) guess what ! history is repeating itself i nv knew tt his prelims is starting on mon ! i havent seen him lift a book at all ! i hope tt hell start panicking soon cause he seems pretty comfortable in his own world .wouldnt it be great shld he make it to AC too? me ,fel,my bro and gen going to sch tgh everymorning=)))))))

rittes bro???

2006-08-10T01:59:00.000-07:00

cant belive tt i wld stay up till 4 to add the nitty gritty details to this blog ...now that i am sober and fully awake ...i think im realli quite mad, call me ...super nuts tong

Everything just fell into place ,i found a blog skin on rainbows,a memory verse,a music code all again on the theme of rainbows ...just listen to the music and look at the page ,ull get what i mean

national dae @AC was the bomb .lols the turn out for our class exceeded my expectations =))12! thou we are few .....For the first time i saw my classmates singing their hearts out in unison with the rest of the school
,their voices were abt 3 times louder than my whole class combined .There we were qianzhi,singning and i and the sb5 girls ,among the multitude of ACSians .most of us were on our chairs (something u wldnt dare tryin pl ..hahaha).from such great heights(its all relative),The guys cld onli look up to us =)))))
all i can rem about that brief moment was the sight of acsians linking hands ,waving them up in the air ,flashing their phones as a class ,someone even broughtour national flag to sch =))) basically it was a noisy affair

the day was made better when nicole msged me about her DSA confirmation to ACJC .God has just blessed me yet again with another jr in AC .first came audrey and then nicole .Ithank god for them and his wonderful provision .

ill post up the national dae photos when i get them from qianzhi=))

my bro and i took a while to get over this ,if u are having a bad dae i hope this makes u laugh ,its frm jacko +)

2006-08-09T09:42:00.000-07:00

hi world!my lovely owner =o)) hehheh created me on national dae ! happie b'dae to me happie b'da to singapore